All about Love for Mac

The New York City Sex Bloggers 2009 Calendar

2008-11-18T22:34:00.001-08:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 11/3/08

NYC sex blogger Urban Gypsy, aka Tess Danesi, had the bright idea just a few weeks ago to create a pin-up calendar of NYC sex writers, educators, and filmmakers in support of Audacia Ray's Sex Work Awareness Project. And now, with a sponsorship by Njoy (among others), a photo shoot by Stacie Joy at the Slipper Room, and a forthcoming release party on Friday, Nov. 14 from 6:30 to 9:30 at the White Rabbit, it's already a reality. We spoke with Tess about the shoot n' shit:

If you were giving the quick, one-sentence descriptive tagline for each of the calendar's pin-ups, what would it be?

Mariella Ella (first on left) is the recently deflowered virgin of the bunch -- a shy, doe-eyed college student toting around a burgeoning bowl full of cherries and an unhealthy obsession for Faulkner.

Rachel Kramer Bussel (second from left) is the hot nerdy girl with glasses that cover the biggest, warmest brown eyes ever, a wicked knowing smile and a penchant for spanking -- both giving and receiving.

Tess (third from left) may be a New Yorker but she's really a gypsy at heart, albeit a gypsy who sees herself frolicking through the forest clad in garments from the season Givenchy was high on the peasant aesthetic, nimbly avoiding stray branches and skipping over rivulets in her newest pair of Pucci stilettos.

Sinclair Sexsmith (fourth from left) is a classically trained poet and kinky queer butch top with a weakness for avocados, whiskey, gender theory, and submissive femmes.

Diva (face hidden) is June Cleaver gone awry. While her pearls were formerly found only wrapped around her neck, these days they are more than likely to be found wrapped around her lover's erection.

Riese (back & center) is the sarcastic and sassy bisexual who never wears heels in real life and doesn't actually have a sex blog, but thinks sex is really sexy.

Jamye Waxman (front & center) has been dubbed "my girl crush" (oops, no that's another story altogether), the "nexxxt generation of sex educator" by wired.com. When spoken in her sexy, husky voice, even the word urethra sounds hot.

Desiree (fifth from right) is a brainy, sexy, foodie, geeky, writer chick from New York who has always had an inclination toward the naughty and whose absolute favorite topic of conversation is sex.

Lux Alptraum (fourth from right) is obsessed with the Internet, computers and sex. You'll have to ask her in what order.

Twanna A. Hines (third from right) is funky, brown and most definitely a chick. "After Ellen" online calls her "one of those women who oozes sexuality." She's also as sharp as Gouda cheese; she even speaks Dutch!

Audacia Ray (second from right) is the embodiment of brainy and sexy wrapped up in one voluptuous package. She has a hidden love of food and a much more overt love of tattoos.

Dr. Elizabeth Wood (first on right), the brilliant academic with flowing waist-length hair, reconnected with her inner girly-girl on this shoot, discovering that a little glam doesn't really hurt (not much anyway)...

Who had the best outfit at the shoot and what was it?...

Jamye had the best Wonder Woman costume ever. She had frilly blue panties with stars glued above her crotch and a red bikini top. It got even better when she went scouring Orchard Street for a golden lasso of truth. In my opinion, Jamye truly is Wonder Woman. Audacia's ceramic corset also made for a fabulous dark and moody shot. Her boobs are nearly incandescent against the red and black of the corset.

Did anyone get naked, or topless, for the shoot?

Well of course there was the all-girl, all-naked romp in the hotel room after the shoot. Oh wait, you meant not just in my imagination, right? We sex bloggers are not as hedonistic as some would like to think, so there's no nudity in this calendar. It's more of a fun and flirty aesthetic. Though Rachel Kramer Bussel's beautiful and bountiful, bare and spanked bottom made in it into the calendar. Next year, more skin!

It's one person per month, right, or did you do any group shots?

It is one person a month this year. I have visions of joining up with out-of-town bloggers next year and having at least two people pose for each month. That, however, would mean a much more rational timeline. This went from brilliant idea to photo shoot in three weeks.

Any funny anecdotes or wardrobe malfunctions during the shoot?

Walking through the lobby of our hotel and then down Allen Street clad in our outfits got us some interesting looks from the staff and on the street. But this is NYC, after all, and strange things are pretty normal here. The prior evening while on our way to the Slipper Room, the location of our shoot, we saw a crowd assembled and I pushed my way to the front to find a woman clad only in a strap-on and boots inside a bodega. She emerged saying she was going to see how far she got before being arrested and then headed her bare-assed way down Orchard Street with a crowd in tow.

Also, Jamye, while in pursuit of that golden lasso, found herself swarmed by young children asking to have their photo taken with Wonder Woman. One man even told her Wonder Woman had always been his fantasy and then proceeded to ask her out on a date. I think she turned him down.

As for wardrobe malfunctions, there was a moment when my always-unruly boobs popped out of my corset as Sinclair dipped me. Facebook took a dim view of that particular shot.

Will each participant get a say in which pic gets used? Who's editing?

Our fabulous photographer, Stacie Joy, picked the best shots of all the pin-ups and sent everyone their own best shots. We each got to pick our favorite from those.

How much will the calendar cost?

The calendars are priced at $20 and can be purchased either online at our blog or in person at release party, which is happening November 14th from 6:30 to 9:30 at White Rabbit. If you show up and are really nice to us, we may even sign them for you. We hope to have them stocked in independent book stores and sex toy shops.

Who's your target market?

Anyone who likes sex and sex writing! And, of course, anyone who wants to be part of our effort to make a difference by supporting Sex Work Awareness. We're even considering a drive to send calendars as a way of thanking sex-positive representatives or to persuade the less than sex-positive to reconsider. In this current political and cultural climate, where sex workers are often considered freaks, mentally or emotionally unstable or drug addicted, I think it's time to bring down these myths and replace them with facts by supporting education initiatives such as SWA.

We also sold days on our calendar to kink events, sex toy manufacturers, and bloggers making our calendar a great tool for keeping all this information at your fingertips. Some companies, like Liberator and OhMiBod even gave us discount codes you can use when you order their products.

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Right Now on Glamour.com

2008-11-18T22:33:00.001-08:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 11/5/08

Smitten wants to know if you think the new President-elect is sexy? Our answer: Yes we do!

Glamour.com suggests 13 dude-approved presents for the hard-to-shop-for guy in your life. But considering there's a mix-tape USB memory stick, a PoGo printer, a three-slot charging station, and monogrammable beer mugs on the list, they make pretty good gifts for the Em & Lo in your life, too.

Erin from Single-ish says her sister knows exactly where your future husband is. We hope for the sake of every single-but-searching girl in the big city that she's very, very wrong.

Forget T&A, do you know "the new sexy body part" that's getting some major attention from fashion designers? Thankfully it's not bellybuttons. We're hoping next year it will be elbows!

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Sex Dream Analysis: "I Keep Cheating on My Boyfriend"

2008-11-18T22:32:00.001-08:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 11/6/08

Very rarely are other people's dreams interesting...except when they're about sex. This week dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg addresses accidental nocturnal infidelity:

Maybe you guys can help me figure out this weird dream that I've had several times. First, a little background: I am 26, I live in Rhode Island, I've been with my wonderful boyfriend for a year, and we have great sex. Really great, actually. Anyway, the dream is pretty simple -- I have sex with someone (not my boyfriend) without realizing it, and by the time I come to my senses, it's too late and I've cheated. The guy I sleep with in the dream varies: once it was my boss, who is about 20 years older than me and not attractive, and another time it was an ex boyfriend. It's always the same thing, though. I sort of hazily, dreamily hook up with the Other Man, and then, once the deed is done, snap to my senses and realize with horror that I've just committed an awful infidelity. I always wake up feeling shaken and creeped out, because in real life, I have no desire to cheat on my boyfriend. What does this MEAN? Help!

Does Rhode Island gal have anything to feel guilty about? Find out after the jump (right after you send us your own dreams!):

Lauri Loewenberg: Mazel Tov on your healthy sex life! Keep it up, sister! Those cheating-without-realizing-it dreams are very frustrating, but not to worry. They don't mean that there is a trampy, cheating harlot inside, waiting to break free! You are getting these dreams because you are probably giving your time, attention, and affection to something that does not involve your boyfriend. Since one time the other man was your boss, it may be a good indication that work may be the culprit. Do you sometimes work too much or find yourself going on and on about work, much to your boyfriend's dismay? The fact that you are getting these dreams means you are aware and sensitive to something that is causing your boyfriend to feel left out, or something that is causing him to feel "cheated" out of his time with you.

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Keith Olbermann on the Book of Love

2008-11-18T22:31:00.003-08:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 11/12/08

An amazing "Special Comment" from Keith Olbermann last night on gay marriage.

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A Day in the Life of a...Porn Librarian

2008-11-18T22:31:00.001-08:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 11/13/08

If you can't find porn you like, the porn librarian at HotMoviesForHer.com might be able to help...

What is Hot Movies For Her is exactly?
We're an adult blog and Video On Demand site for women. Our goal is to help women find what turns them on in a safe and encouraging environment. Besides offering a truckload of porn, we review movies, books and sex toys, blog about the industry and sexuality, and try to provide a non-judgmental place for women to explore their sexuality.

As their "porn librarian," what do your job responsibilities include?
I review movies, books and toys, and blog for the site. I also spend a big chunk of time doing nerdy database work that's not very interesting to people who are fascinated by the fact that I work in adult.

What's an average day like?
Email, writing, database work, usually with porn playing in the background. I also drink a lot of tea...

What's an extraordinary day like (you know, the perks)?
Every other week or so I receive a box full of "adult novelties," which is pretty cool. We also sponsor events all over, so my favorite part of the job is traveling and talking to women about porn and sex. I've had some amazing conversations with strangers.

I once had an airport attendant in a very small (2 flights a day) airport come up to me and ask for my business card after going through my suitcase. I was hesitant, not knowing why he asked and it seemed a little creepy, but it turns out he was this 65 year old dude who was gay and had just come to terms with it. He was just looking for someone to talk with and we've exchanged emails since. I introduced him to the gay community online and he made me reconsider what I pack in my suitcase!

What's the worst part of your job?
I work from home, which seems super awesome to everyone and it's really nice some days, but I miss having someone to eat lunch or go out after work with. And gapers. (In gonzo porn, sometimes they will focus in on a gaping vagina or anus after sex. No matter how many times I see it, I still turn away.)

What's your sexual orientation, and how does that affect your job?
I'm a big lesbo but I'm not sure it affects my job much. Over the years I've discovered that I personally enjoy all sorts of porn, regardless of gender. If two people have great chemistry, I usually like a scene. So I review hetero, trans, gay, fetish, and lesbian porn on the site. The only thing I won't review is bad porn. If I don't think it's good, I stop watching and try something else. I think that no matter what a woman identifies as, she'll find something on the site between the reviews, sex tips, and daily blogging on the site. Plus there are four women, two of whom are super straight writing on the site!

How does your job affect your sex life?
This job has taught me and my partner the importance of communication regarding sexuality, which has kept things hot in the bedroom.

What would you recommend for women, gay or straight, who just don't like porn (the lighting, gynecological detail, fake boobs, bad acting), but wish they did, or wish they could get into it with their partners, or wish they could accentuate their fantasy lives with it, with something?
Don't give up! There is such an amazing variety of material out there and I think everyone can find something that turns them on if they're willing to explore. There are a lot of pornos that are chock full of the things you mentioned and if that's not your thing, it's easy to get discouraged. However, there are also a ton of really smart people making movies that are revolutionary! I would start by looking at something from Comstock Films. Tony Comstock creates these really interesting sex documentaries that star real life couples. There are lengthy interviews, so you really get to know about them before getting to the dirty part. I would also suggest checking out Jamye Waxman's Personal Touch series. They're instructional videos that discuss topics like using sex toys to female orgasm. Waxman manages to include a ton of great information without ever being boring. There's also lots of hot sex tucked in between the info!

You were a women's studies major -- are a lot women's studies majors automatically anti-porn?
I'd like to think that women's studies majors aren't automatically anything! There was a huge anti-pornography movement in the 70's and 80's and I've read Dworkin and MacKinnon. I actually started writing a paper as a sophomore that was anti-porn, but after researching and processing, found I didn't agree with the main arguments. Honestly, the idea that porn is an evil thing just seems a little dated to me. I feel like it's just another attempt at suppressing women's sexuality.

How can you consume porn conscientiously (i.e. you don't want to support any companies that exploit young, poor, uneducated, perhaps drug-addicted or mentally unstable women)?
The same way you consume food conscientiously. Whether you're looking into adult or apples, research where it comes from. With the Internet, it's easy to learn a little about the company, director and stars of most movies. The industry is highly regulated, so if you're watching anything from an actual U.S. company, you can at least know that there are contracts involved. Of course, there are women who get into the industry for the wrong reasons, but there are also a lot of smart, interesting ladies who know exactly what they're doing. Seek those ladies out! One of my favorite ethical pornos is The Bi Apple directed by sexpert Audacia Ray. It's a really sex-positive movie that stars an eclectic group of people and real orgasms.

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One Hand Gesture Is Worth Two in the Bush

2008-11-18T22:30:00.003-08:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 11/14/08

Um, wait, what? A friend just sent us this picture, apparently taken this week, and uploaded to this White House URL (sure to be taken down any second now). We too asked our friend, "Isn't that the symbol for the tricky handwork move known as 'the shocker," i.e two fingers in the va-ja-jay and one in the bum?!" Well, yes and no.

Apparently, the picture has something to do with the Arizona State University's softball and track and field teams--each won national championships and visited the White House this week. The Sun Devil is their mascot, and he carries a pitchfork, which this hand gesture represents. Plus, it looks like the letter W, for George W. Bush. And technically speaking, the the shocker would have your index and middle finger pressed together.

But at first glance you've got to admit it looks an awful lot like "the shocker," which is why we, being the two very mature and responsible sex writers that we are, felt obligated to post it. Sure, it's an innocent, unfortunate, accidental pornographic reference made by an unknowing administration, but one we think is symbolic of how utterly obscene this government's policies have been--and how they've basically screwed the country over.

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Sex Dream Analysis: "My Ex-Husband and I Are Having Crazy Sex"

2008-11-18T22:30:00.001-08:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 11/17/08

Very rarely are other people's dreams interesting...except when they're about sex. This week, dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tackles a mysterious reappearing ex.

I have been having dreams about my ex-husband lately. I am kind of confused because I keep wondering if leaving him was the right choice and now I have these intense dreams that are so real it scares me. All the dreams I have about him are different but they all involve sex or heavy petting. And sometimes we do crazy things during sex that we never did while we were married. I would really love to know what is going on here because I am in a relationship now that I have been in over a year and it just all of a sudden started happening.

Should she go back to the well, or is she just dreaming in rose-tinted glasses? Find out after the jump (right after you send us your own dreams!):

Lauri Loewenberg: Your uncertainty over the end of your marriage is the cause of these dreams. Because you question yourself, the idea of still being with your ex is alive and well inside your mind and rises to the surface while you dream. Now, since it seems to be only sexual activity that is involved in these dreams and nothing else, I'm going to have to ask you a very personal question...how do your ex and your current relationship compare in the ol' knockin' boots department? Perhaps your dreaming mind is trying to compensate for what you aren't quite getting with your boyfriend. And perhaps you are doing wild and crazy things with your ex that you never actually did because your boyfriend may not be giving you enough variety. Since you've been with your current guy for over a year, and these dreams are just now starting, it may be that you are beginning to realize he could be around for some time to come, in which case your dream self is nagging you to spice it up, oil it down, spank it...you get the idea!

Submit your own sex dream for analysis to dxxxx@xxxcom. Anonymity guaranteed!

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Unlikely MacBook Pro Photo Circulates

2008-09-17T15:57:00.001-07:00

Black lining around the screen looks sexier. I'm sold.

via MacRumors : Mac News and Rumors on 9/17/08

Image found on T-Systems.de

Existing promotional image
A possible though unlikely image of the upcoming MacBook Pro has circulated on the internet this morning and appears to have originated at German retailer T-...

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College Confessional: Sex on Campus

2008-08-29T15:17:00.001-07:00

oh! I did that millions of times..

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 8/21/08

As a sort of "back to school" post, our soon-to-be-senior Maddie Phillips reviews the best and worst places to do it on campus (*asterisked items are her "been there, done that" locales):

THE BEST:

Library*: Classic. Who hasn't had that hot librarian fantasy? You can play it out on location by making a special trip to the top floor of your university library. Just make sure you keep the noise down, of course.

Study Lounge*: This should come as no surprise to anyone who has lived in a dorm before. My boyfriend and I both had roommates that were usually around at night when we wanted to, um, get it on 'til the break of dawn. So, we would lay down for a bit until it was late in the evening and sneak into the study room down the hall and barricade (the lockless) door.

Laundry Room*: Hot bumping and grinding combined with even more hot bumping and grinding.

Empty Classroom: Now this is the kind of extra credit that would draw some attendance. This works best if it's the classroom of your most hated professor.

Campus Theater: You may feel inspired to really emote, just don't "act out" any orgasms--keep 'em real.

Music Rehearsal Room*: Aren't they all for making beautiful music? NOTE: Sound-proof walls are like magic.

Campus Television Station: If there was ever a place to make a video...

On the Lake*: Not every school has one but Oswego sits right on Lake Ontario with the bragging rights of one of the most beautiful sunsets in the world. If your school is near a body of water that you haven't had sex in, on, or near, then you have your work cut out for you this semester.

Racquetball Court: The only truly private room in our school gym is the racquetball room. I'm excited to get in there and work up a sweat this semester.

Rooftop*: It can be a bit difficult to gain access, but if you can it's worth the work. NOTE: You might want to make sure you're on the highest building in your general vicinity; otherwise you won't be without an audience.

Art Studio*: My ex-boyfriend was an art major, which apparently requires a lot of late nights in the studio. I went with him once for a photo shoot he was using me in which unsurprisingly turned erotic quickly. If any one walks in I suppose you could always claim you were practicing your life drawing.

THE WORST:

Community Showers*: Obvious, uncomfortable and dirty. I don't know why people think this is sexy. It's usually filthy, and has terrible lighting.

Parking Lot*: I'm all for car sex. As a matter of fact I'm a huge fan. But I'm no exhibitionist and sex in a school parking lot is just inviting voyeurism.

Bathroom Stall: I'd rather do it in the community shower.

Elevators (in service): Unless you are superhuman and you climax faster than a speeding bullet, I don't see anyone truly getting off in an elevator. However, if the elevator is docked, you're in business.

Stairwells: Hmmm...sex in the wake of a million dirty footprints. Pass.

Hallway: There is adventurous... and then there's dumb.

Roommate's Bed*: I hope my roommate never reads this...this one is a bad idea because in the throes of passion it's likely you'll leave evidence. Also, your roommate has a key to her own room, which might mean awkward walk-in. Plus, it's just plan rude to invade someone's personal space like that. Not worth the risk (realized in retrospect.)

ALL-TIME WORST PLACE

In Your Own Bed (when your roommate is still in her/his bed)*: I really hope my roommate never reads this! Picture it: Your roommate skipped her morning class and is selfishly cutting into your usual morning workout routine. Do you risk playing the "Don't wake the roommate" game? I know what you're thinking: "Well, if you're quiet enough...maybe." The correct answer is NO. Never. You are not Chuck Norris: Your roommate will know that you're doing the nasty right next to her (whether she let's you know or not) and she will hate you--forever. Besides, who wants quiet, cautious, borderline paranoid sex anyway?

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Poll: Is Pubic Hair Dye a Sign of the Apocalypse?

2008-08-29T15:16:00.001-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 8/25/08

This fake fashion show of couture pubic hair designs by Stefane Monzon "sponsored by" Remington pretty much sums up how we feel about the beauty/fashion industry: the lengths people, especially women, go to for external beautification are absolutely ridiculous...just don't ask us to give up our trips to Aveda!

We were reminded of this hilarious video when an overseas sex toy shop sent out a press release announcing they are carrying Betty, "color for the hair down there." Turns out pubic hair dye wasn't just something made up for an episode of Sex and the City. Yes, you can now match the carpet to the drapes, cover gray or just freak out your partner (along with blonde, brown, black and auburn, they've got hot pink and aqua blue) with dye made specifically for the short and curlies of your most sensitive area. In fact, the site claims it has amassed over 100,000 users of its product in the last two years. Is this just more fun to be had with your sexual physical identity or further proof that women need to use less brain power on the minutia of grooming if they want to head more Fortune 500 companies, earn as much as men for the same job, and/or become president?
What do you think of pubic hair dye? (you can choose more than one)
( polls)

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Advice Redux: How Should I Store My Sex Toys?

2008-08-29T15:12:00.005-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 8/26/08

About a week ago we began answering this question in a post and asked you for other bright ideas. Well, we got some great suggestions in the comments. Plus, we did a little more investigative research of our own. And so we've decided to do a more comprehensive list of sex toy storage solutions -- here are 17. Just remember to abide by the storage rules we outlined before...

1. Devine Toy Storage
This is probably the most stylish line of purpose-made sex toy storage containers available. They've got a lockable toy box, a carry-on, a condom cube (which could be used for a little bullet vibe or vibrating cock ring), a satchel (pictured above) for bigger items like a paddle or a bunch of stuff for a naughty weekend, even a lingerie envelope. The site is cool, but you can't get a great feel for what they really look like until you visit other sites that have them for sale, such as Babeland and Feel Your Passion.

2. For Your Nymphomation Collection
Hands down, the best name in the biz of sex toy storage. They've got various-sized toy boxes (even one specially designed for your Hitachi Magic Wand), various-sized individual toy cases (including a tubular one in the shape of a heart, aw), a bridal collection for the best bachelorette party gift ever, bdsm cases for long floggers, even a big rolling suitcase with about a million pockets inside (for dominatrices, Tupperware-style sex toy party throwers, and people really addicted to sex toys).

3. Three Number Combination Lock Boxes
These are lightweight boxes with metal trim lined with either a black vinyl or black velvet interior. Erotic Rites has three styles available (black, silver, and pink with a butterfly pattern). BetterSex has a larger version of the pink box.

4. Fun Factory Cans and Bags
Of course our favorite toy manufacturer makes something cool to store their prod in. They've got a striped can and a silver can for their smaller toys like their Smartballs and miniVibes, as well as a velvet bag with satin lining for most of their standard-sized vibes and dildos. Eden Fantasy has got both cans.

5. Sneaky Sack
Holistic Wisdom has a whole series of sex toy storage products. The first is a locking bag that's antimicrobial, washable, and durable with three separate storage pockets!...

6. Zomi Bags
Holistic Wisdom also has bags in oriental silk brocade big enough to carry multiple bedside accessories (way better than animal print).

7. Separation Bags
Finally, Holistic Wisdom has individual bags to prevent toys from coming into contact with each other. They come in three fabrics -- neon crush, organza, and satin -- all, unfortunately, in shades of purple.

8. Sex Toy Pillow
They look like regular throw pillows, but there's a secret zippered compartment, usually lined with silk, for storing all your sex toys and lubes. The concept is awesome, though we wish the fabric choices weren't so lame. There's the animal print and the grandma pattern. See #15 for another idea.

9. Under the Bed Storage Container with Foam Padding
The typical plastic flat storage containers are great if you've got a bunch of toys to store, though they're usually clear, which isn't that discrete. But take DailyBedpost reader Donna's awesome suggestion and get a stock foam case insert you can customize to your individual toy needs and voila!

10. Shoe Organizers
There are under-the-bed, hang-in-the-closet, and, like DailyBedpost reader Lolita recommended, over-the-door varieties.

11. Tool Box
DailyBedpost reader Stan said he went to the local home supply outlet and got a manly tool chest ("for my, uh, tools").

12. Tackle Box
Homemade-Sex-Toys.com recommends a tackle box: "This box keeps everything in its place and protects your toys from dirt and dust, and the transparent lid lets you keep inventory of your toys and supplies. With its low profile, it's perfect for sliding out of sight under the bed or sofa."

13. Plastic Desk Tray
While we didn't think Homemade-Sex-Toys.com's suggestions of using a tool belt, a spice rack or a vertical desk organizer were all that practical, the plastic desk tray could work if put in a drawer and perhaps covered with a towel.

14. Around-the-House Re-Purposed Separation Cases
Makeup bags or old clean socks are a cheap and easy way to keep each of your toys from touching each other, from clinking around in a drawer, and from gathering dust.

15. Make Your Own
DailyBedpost reader Jen said she crocheted her own cases for each of her toys. The DIY Network tells you how to make your own pillow with a secret pocket.

16. Book with Secret Compartment
You can pay a lot of money for one like this. Or, like we said before, you can make your own, just like Tim Robbins in Shawshank Redemption. Here's how.

17. The Box the Toy Came In
If you bought a cheap novelty toy (shame on you), it'll have come in a cheap plastic box you should just throw away (consider ditching the toy too). But if you invested in a nicer toy (that'll be nicer to your body), then chances are good it came in it's own nice carrying case, like the like the Delight or the Fukuoku 9000.

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When Someone's Been a Very Naughty Boy...

2008-08-29T15:12:00.003-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 8/28/08

Rachel Kramer Bussel is a prolific producer of erotica anthologies--the last time we spoke with her, we marveled that she was the editor of not one but two anthologies just on spanking alone. Well, turns out that she still had more to show and tell when it comes to spanking, because she just put out her third anthology on the topic: Spanked: Red-Cheeked Erotica. We figured it was about time with sat down with Rachel for a good ol' natter about the art of spanking.

What makes a good spanking story?

Buildup and anticipation. You have to show the reader why the person wants to spank or be spanked, what about their partner drew them in; is it a case of them just needing to be spanked, or is there something about this particular person that makes them want to bend over? Creativity is key too; there are so many ways you can get spanked, so many implements and scenarios. Yes, some may be clichéd (schoolgirl, punishment, etc.) but even those you can add new life into if you do it right.

This is your third spanking anthology! Is there really that much to say about spanking?

I think spanking is so varied because it touches on the physical and emotional, and each encounter is different.

So what's the physical appeal of spanking?

I'm not a doctor so I don't know exactly, but for some people the charge they get from being spanked turns them on, plain and simple. Everything from the positioning (bent over, for example) to the way the spanking impacts your genitals, can cause arousal. For me, it's one of the fastest ways to get me close to orgasm, and that happens very quickly--not every single time, but if the other person is into it and we're connecting on that kinky level, yes.

After the jump: D.I.Y. spanking props, spanking roleplaying, and the spanking "sweet spot," oh my!...

And it's not just about the physical feeling, right? It's also about the sound, and the visual? There's a reason why the subtitle is "Red-Cheeked Erotica"...

It's definitely about the sound, the visual effects, the mood, the motives behind the spanking. For some people, it's purely physical--they get off on the sensation of being spanked, like any other sexual act, and it's not necessarily about who in particular is doing the spanking. But I think for many, if not most, people into spanking, it's also about the mood. Spankings can be happy and playful, like in L. Elise Bland's "The Breeding Barn," or they can be intense and dark like my "The Depths of Despair" [both stories in this anthology]. They can be about mock punishment, or about living out an alter ego. The positioning is also important: having someone over your knee, versus bent over a chair versus against the wall, can make a difference in the spanking dynamic.

What would you say is the emotional appeal of spanking?

Gosh...to me, spanking strips away so many of the outer layers of protection I have around my emotional core, in a way that even sex doesn't always do. When I'm being spanked, I'm so in the moment; all I care about is when the next smack is coming and how it feels and whether I'm doing a "good job" of being a spankee. It's such a rush and it brings out all my needs to be wanted and praised. And when I'm spanking someone, I'm always just in awe that they'll let me do that, let me go there; it often gets very heated (in both senses of the word), very fast. For a lot of people, getting spanked is a way to be vulnerable and let go. In my story in Spanked, the protagonist wants to cry during her spanking; I think people cry from being spanked not so much because it hurts per se, but for the same reason people cry sometimes after sex--it's so powerful their body just needs an outlet.

Is there usually some element of role-playing in spanking? (i.e. "Someone's been a naughty boy...")

There definitely is for many people; others simple love spanking and don't need that element. But I think many want to be told they've been "bad" and transgressed in some way. Spanking is excellent for all kinds of roleplaying, and can help get you in the mood. Some people prefer or need this to feel like it's okay to explore spanking; it gives them an out, so as opposed to having to say (even to themselves) "I want to be spanked," they can say, "I've been bad, so I deserve to be spanked," even if everyone knows that they're really the same thing.

What would you say to someone who wants to try spanking but is afraid they'll feel silly and laugh?

First of all, it's okay to laugh; it can be fun and it's fine to find spanking both amusing and hot. Second, why not go for it? The worst that happens is you find it ridiculous or not fun and you do something else. What I like about spanking is that it can be totally lighthearted--you can basically play "drums" on someone's butt--or it can escalate into something super erotic. It's all good. There's no right or wrong when it comes to how to conduct a spanking. That being said, even I find it challenging at times to ask to be spanked, especially if I'm asking someone and don't know if they're into spanking or not. It can be nervewracking but is worth a shot. What I love about spanking is that it can go from silly to totally serious and sexy (and vice versa) in a second, just based on a tone of voice or the tension between the people.

What's your number one spanking tip?

If you're giving a spanking, teasing and anticipation (and maybe a little frustration) are always good. Especially if the other person is just dying to be spanked, withholding that reward can be hot; see how far they'll go to get that spanking. Make them beg. It'll still feel good later.

What's one thing that a lot of people do wrong when spanking?

Go too fast and play too rough. You don't need to spank them as hard as you possibly can for them to enjoy it. Feel them out; if you know they can take a lot or are into it, sure, go ahead and slap them hard. Then maybe wait a moment and do something else or lightly stroke the area you spanked. The joy of getting spanking isn't necessarily taking as much as you can immediately (or ever). There's much to be said for building up a spanking, both in a single session and over time. You can always give them something to look forward to, and often spanking them in the same spot repeatedly can have just as powerful an effect as going all out from the start.

What are some spanking safety tips people should bear in mind?

The part of the butt to focus on is the so-called "sweet spot," the inner quadrant where the butt cheeks meet. You can move around but you don't want to spank the tailbone. Check in with the person you're spanking to make sure they're physically okay and are enjoying what you're doing. If you're a bottom, make sure that you either have a safeword or another way to stop the spanking if it's going too far for your comfort, and also make sure you're okay telling the person spanking you that you need a break. Just because someone is taking a dominant role doesn't mean they know everything about you and your responses. Be extra cautious with things like whips that might wrap around the butt to hit the hipbone; that's a no-no. But mainly for both parties to be aware of the other's limits and just pay attention, especially at first; once you get to know someone and what they're into, you can better know how far to push them (or how far you want to be pushed).

What's your favorite DIY spanking prop?

Books are good! I like rulers even though I probably couldn't locate one easily in my home. Really, though, one of the best, and certainly easiest and cheapest spanking props is your hand. There's something extra intimate about giving or getting a hand spanking, because the spanker feels it as much as the spankee. Next to that, I'd say a ruler.

And what's your favorite purpose-made spanking prop?

I have this fabulous (and fashionable) paddle that's black leather on one side and leopard-print fake fur on the other. It looks cool hanging up, delivers a nice sting, and then can be used to make nice on someone's ass. Pretty paddles are always tops in my book; I just got a new (and, so far, unused) one shaped like a cat. It's purple and I like it cause it looks so damn cute but I know can really deliver a blow. [Shop here or here for some cute spanking paddles of your own.]

Finally, we have to ask: do you think these undies were invented by a spanking fan?

They certainly look like it! Or someone who just wants easy access. Either way, they're hot!

For more information on Spanked: Red-Cheeked Erotica, visit Spanked.Wordpress.com.

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Sex Dream Analysis: "My Husband's a Lying, Cheating Bastard"

2008-08-29T15:12:00.001-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 8/27/08

Photo via Splash

Very rarely are other people's dreams interesting...except when they're about sex. This week dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tackles a sex nightmare:

Current dream is my husband cheating, woman is always super nice, he is never apologetic and defends her. I smack him around but my blows never touch him.

Should she hire a private investigator? Start cheating on him in her own dreams? Find out after the jump (right after you send us your own dreams!):

Lauri Lowenberg: Unless you have a really good reason to suspect hubby of getting his pleasures elsewhere, I wouldn't start snooping through his pockets and his drawers (either kind) just yet! Ask yourself what he is doing that is causing you to feel "cheated" out of your time with him. He must be giving his time, attention, and possibly even his affection to something that does not involve you. Is it work? The Wii? Maybe he's tinkering around with the hot rod in the garage? He's never apologetic in your dreams because, in real life, he may have no idea that you are feeling a little left out. And your blows never touch him because your dream is showing you that you aren't "reaching him" in the old communication department. Once you are able to pinpoint what it is that he is doing that is causing a bit of jealousy, let him know. There may be a dinner at a four-star restaurant in it for ya. Sweet dreams!

The dreamer responds: Wow! I think you got it! My husband is working a lot and traveling. His job is very high stress and people are constantly demanding his attention. He makes million dollar decisions. So when he comes home he is quiet and wants to be left alone. He also travels more and I sometimes feel left behind, like he is becoming more worldly and experienced than me. I often worry about him meeting another woman who, like him, is worldly and not just a little school teacher like myself. Yes, it is difficult to communicate with him, he is very stoic. So nothing more juicy than being married to a workaholic.

Submit your own sex dream for analysis to dxxxx@xxxcom. Anonymity guaranteed!

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Before I Die I Want to... Experiment with a Woman

2008-08-29T15:11:00.001-07:00

Sure..Every lesbian turned thinks the same way and then there is no going back.

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 8/29/08

Photo via Splash

This week's bucket list edition goes out to a whole bunch of women who have written in to say that they're straight but fancy getting jiggy with a lady. Take this note from Allie, for example: "Before I die (actually, before I settle down), I want to sleep with another woman. How do I tap into my bi-curious side, and how do I even find someone to experiment with?" Oh, and if you're on the fence about attacking your own bucket list, consider this: Dave Freeman, co-author of the original 100 Things to Do Before You Die book, died this week at age 47, after hitting his head in a fall (his family says he got through about half his list). So here are a few tips for all you post-college L.U.G.s out there. Go on, do it for Dave!

1. Online personals are the perfect place to find a candidate for your L.U.G. fling. And if you're not quite sure you're ready to jump in yet, it's a great way to flirt with other gals online and get an idea of who might be your type by window-shopping. Just make sure you're honest -- don't go checking the "looking for a serious relationship" box.

2. If part of your bucket list wish is to actually get picked up by a lady (or do the picking up yourself) then just head over to your local lesbian bar. Because believe it or not, you'll find a whole bunch of lesbians there.

3. Many a straight woman who has taken it upon herself to "experiment" assumes that the entire lesbian world will be giddy with excitement at the prospect of a one-night stand with a het gal. So this het gal walks into a lesbian bar and can't believe that the other patrons aren't falling over themselves to get to her. But a lot of lesbians just can't be bothered with the hassle of a woman who may freak out halfway through or just not commit to the cunnilingus. If you're one of those het gals who always relies on the man to make the first move -- shame on you -- you may have to actually get off your butt and do some of the heavy lifting seduction work yourself.

4. No matter how you meet her, whether online or off, be honest about your intentions and (lack of) expectations. Being a L.U.G. for a night doesn't give you the right to act like an asshole playa dude.

5. If your town is all out of gay bars, you could always steer an evening toward a game of Truth or Dare or Spin the Bottle with a bunch of like-minded friends. Because nine times out of ten, those games end up in two girlfriends (meaning girl [space] friends) making out.

6. Buyer beware: If a game of Truth or Dare ends up in two straight(ish) girls making out, nine times out of ten a dude will try to join in. So if you'd like things to go a little further than French kissing, you might want to play Seven Minutes in Heaven and put a lock on the closet door.

7. Buyer beware, redux: Seven minutes is not nearly enough time to get to "heaven."

8. If you're feeling panicked about what to do, consider this: she's got the same parts as you do -- it's not like this is foreign territory. (Tongues and fingers are more than enough, no need to break out the strap-on.) So pretend you're hooking up with yourself and go from there. Just remember that every woman's parts work slightly differently. Which means, the number one rule about hooking up with a woman is to pay attention to how her body responds to what you're doing.

9. Just because you're fulfilling your bucket list dream, doesn't give you the right to be a selfish lover. And just because you're a novice at sapphic love doesn't give you the right to be a lazy lover, either.

10. Have fun! This is only sex, after all. If you're not enjoying yourself, you're kind of missing the point.

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Advice: What's Better Than Sex?

2008-07-29T16:21:00.001-07:00

Offcourse Chocolate

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 7/24/08

Hi Em & Lo,

I'm a 25-year-old gay guy living in NYC. I thought I'd ask for your suggestions and inputs for my blog, Better Than Sex. The premise of the blog is that I don't have sex for 100 days but for each of those days, I have to find or do something in NYC that is, you guessed it, Better Than Sex. I started it a little more than a month ago as a social experiment and a way to explore the art and cultural offerings of the city. It could be food, a play, a concert, a hobby or practically anything under the Manhattan sun. Some of the fun things that I've done so far include going on a silent date at the Cloisters; seeing Les Paul, the man who invented the electric guitar and is now 93, in concert; the chocolate cube dessert at Park Avenue Summer [pictured above]; and randomly going to City Hall to be a witness to a wedding ceremony. I just attended a cuddle party in NJ and will be going to the Russian/Turkish Baths in the East Village later this week. It would be great if you can recommend things/events that would be Better Than Sex (or really bad sex, at least!) that I can explore for my blog. Thanks very much and I hope to hear from you soon!

B.T.S. Boy

Dear B.T.S. Boy,

We love it! Here are our suggestions. We tried to keep most of them either free or at least cheap, but sometimes orgasmic-like fun costs--and unlike with sex, you can't pay in sweat.

20 THINGS THAT ARE (ALMOST) BETTER THAN SEX IN NYC...

1. Taking a Circle Line Sightseeing Cruise Around Manhattan
The 2- or 3-hour cruises will give you a view of all the NYC Waterfalls by Olafur Eliasson. We like the Harbor Lights Cruise at night--it can replace the sex with romance.

2. Riding the Staten Island Ferry
If the Circle Line is too pricey, just take the ferry there and back for similarly spectacular views for FREE. Plus, you can live out your Working Girl fantasies.

3. Sipping Overpriced Cocktails at the Mandarin Oriental
The Lobby Lounge on the 35th floor has amazing views of Central Park and the skyline. Dress to the nines and go at off-peak hours to try to get a good seat--guests get the best ones first, if not all of them. You'll feel screwed when the bill for two drinks comes to $60 bucks.

4. Being a Rockstar for Two Minutes
We're sure some famous frontman said performing in front of a live audience was better than sex--here's your chance to find out: Every Monday night Arlene's Grocery hosts Rock n' Roll karaoke with a live band backing you up.

5. Riding the Cyclone at Coney Island
That rickety, jerky, wooden nightmare will get your I'm-gonna-die adrenal pumping--and when you get off you'll feel like you've gotten off.

6. Visiting Governor's Island for Free
It's that weird military island that was empty for years, but is now open to the public every Friday, Saturday and Sunday until October 12th: You can bike ride, picnic, check out concerts and art festivals, take a tour...the ferry ride and admission to the Island are FREE!

7. Attending a Free Concert of the Music of Johnny Cash
Better to get a ring of fire this way, than through rough anal sex: The River to River Festival has a ton of FREE events, including a Cash concert on July 26th at 8pm with a bunch of artists covering songs well-known and obscure from Johnny Cash.

8. Taking Free Dance Lessons at Lincoln Center
Since you can't do the horizontal dance of love, do an upright one: From July 8-26, 2008, this outdoor dance party called "Midsummer Night Swing" features 25 theme nights--including swing, salsa, disco, funk, and more. Each evening begins with a dance lesson at 6:30 p.m. for dancers of all levels of experience. The live music begins at 7:30 p.m.

9. Taking a Helicopter Tour of Manhattan
Instead of getting blown, blow a couple hundred on a 15-minute aerial tour--the views will blow you away.

10. Attending Free Shakespeare in the Park
The Public Theater is doing Hair this summer, so maybe you can get some nudity that way. (Not sure what relationship Shakespeare had to hippie musicals.)

11. Watching Brooklyn Bridge Park's Movies with a View
They're not showing anything too sexy, but hey, they've got Cabaret on Aug 14th.

12. Swimming in Holiday Inn's Rooftop Pool
For 60 bucks, you can gain access to the rooftop pool at this chain hotel on 57th Street and get as close to sex as you can without having it: undress, get all wet, and feel refreshed afterwards.

13. Going on a Scavenger Hunt
Watson Adventures offers adult scavenger hunts, like "Sex and the Village," based on locations from the show and the movie.

14. Taking a Gay & Lesbian History Walking Tour
Big Onion is one of the biggies when it comes to walking tours and on this one you'll "discover the many facets of lesbian and gay history as we trace the development of Greenwich Village. Stops could include: The Stonewall Inn, The Duplex, and sites associated with Bayard Rustin, Willa Cather, Eleanor Roosevelt, and Audre Lorde." Not sex, but sexual-orientation related.

15. Taking a Flying Trapeze Lesson
Flying has got to be better than sex.

16. Going on a CrazyBlindDate
Just don't have sex on it. (See this post for more details.)

17. Answering a Strictly Platonic Ad on Craigslist
Like this one. Or better yet, this one!

18. Kayaking on the Hudson for Free
The boats are very phallic.

19. Taking a Power Nap in a Nap Pod
Paying to take a nap at Yelo is indulgent, relaxing, and ridiculous, just like sex.

20. Becoming a New York Cares Volunteer
Go to their website, create an account, sign up for and then attend an orientation, choose a project (they have hundreds of one-off or repeat events each month), sign up and start volunteering. Their biggest day of the year is New York Cares Day on October 18th. Helping out makes you realize what a non-issue sex really is.

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PETA: Sexy or Sexist?

2008-07-29T16:20:00.003-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 7/27/08

This week, in response to an opinion piece in the NY Times on the legal rights of apes in which PETA's moves were referred to as boneheaded, the president of PETA wrote a letter to the paper defending its use of provocative sexual imagery in its animal rights campaigns, saying: "Forgive us our bikinis and our shock tactics, but our message that all beings--both human and nonhuman--deserve compassion and respect is one that we must work hard to make heard." It's a line that's easy for people like those over at Feministing to take issue with, when so many of PETA's ads use female sexuality in a way that seems disrespectful and lacking compassion. See their PETA collage for examples.

Now, we're no apologists for PETA, despite Lo's vegetarian status and her constant urging of Em to give up her foie-gras ways. Ever since their lame "Fur trim is unattractive" ad, we've always been wary of PETA making its messages at women's expense (come on, we're all animals, and we're all furry to some extent). HOWEVER, a quick review of their video library (including their banned ads) and we can't deny they've got some really good, sex-related content that's really not that offensive at all! (Well, unless you're a meat eater.) Here are our 5 faves:

1. "Sex Talk" (video above)
This is one damn funny ad. It's a riff on The Talk parents have with their teenage kids about sex. Unless you're a black market back-alley puppy pusher, you can't not love it.

2. "Sex and the Kitty"
Another fun one about what cats do when you're at work. Who knew kitties had O-faces?

3. "Rude Food"
Basically, vegetable porn. Aw, yeah.

4. "Sexy Sausage: Director's Cut"
A play on '70s porno--it uses a ridiculous porn plotline cliché to show how ridiculous it is that we eat crap that makes us impotent. Yes, there's some typical female T&A, but at least it's counterbalanced by the beefcake guy and the closeup on his package!

5. "Milk Gone Wild"
A parody of the Girls Gone Wild videos: instead of boobies, they've got udders. Because when you think about it--or, at least, when Lo thinks about it--it's kind of gross that we drink another species' breast milk. We wish there were a little more exposition in this one, but we didn't think the now-infamous New Yorker cover of the Obamas needed any explanation, so we'll give it to PETA. Yeah, okay, maybe this one could be considered a teeny bit offensive, though we're no fans of GGW and we thought it was funny. However, their follow-up, "Milk Gone Wild 2: At the Car Wash," is pure gratuitous titillation, and that really is too bad. Yes, we all have our lines.

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Before I Die I Want to... Make a Home Video

2008-07-29T16:20:00.001-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 7/25/08

This week's bucket list edition goes out to reader Rachel, who really wants to make a home video with her guy. And not the kind of home video that would be viewed at family reunions, we're assuming (not intentionally, anyway). Here's how to do it right...

Top Ten Tips on Making a Home Video

1. Do you absolutely, 100 percent, no exceptions, no maybes, trust your guy not to screen the home video for his buddies during guys' night in? If the answer is no, then there's no need for you to read on, because we absolutely, 100 percent, no exceptions, no maybes, forbid you to make a sex tape with this guy.

2. Okay, so maybe you trust him, but shit happens, ya know? Visiting aunts go nosing around your basement, tapes get mislabeled and popped into the VCR at the wrong time. Plus, unexpected heartbreak can do funny things to a person's sense of right and wrong. So, just to be safe, why not insist on holding onto the only copy of the tape yourself? Or maybe shoot yourselves just from the neck up--or just from the neck down. If you're really paranoid, you could always erase the tape as soon as you've watched it once together. After all, at least half the fun is in the making when it comes to your amateur porn vid.

3. You don't have to look like a porn star to make a home sex tape, and you certainly don't have to act like one. Also, maybe we're squares, but we think that making extended eye contact with the camera during a sex tape is a bit creepy.

4. Pass the video camera back and forth between you to take it in turns being the demanding director. Think of the camera as a sex toy (just don't try to actually, you know, stick it anywhere).

5. Feeling camera shy? Dim the lights, try candle light, or experiment with your camera's night vision feature. They're all more flattering than bright overhead lights--plus you'll relax more. Also, no need to disrobe completely if you don't want to; sometimes a few well-placed skimpy items of clothing is sexier than nothing at all.

6. Fancy making a themed sex tape? Why not role-play a celebrity sex tape coupling?

7. Never ever ever shoot from below--this is the least-flattering angle known to mankind. Normally we hiss at advice columnists who tell you about sexual positions that flatter your figure (evil incarnate!) but this is a sex tape we're talking about and, let's be honest, we're all vain. That said, no matter what you think of your body now, we guarantee you'll look back on it fondly when you're 80. And if you don't make a sex tape now? You may just look back on it slightly wistfully, too.

8. Be sure to get your partner's permission first (because, duh, it's illegal if you don't).

9. Is the sound of your squeaky mattress making the whole thing feel too slapstick? Then crank the tunes and pretend you're on MTV. (Seriously, have you seen the music videos the kids are making these days? Total soft porn.)

10. And, most importantly of all, have fun! Because a smiley happy sex tape is usually a lot less cringe-inducing to watch than you trying to do your best Jenna Jameson impression.

Don't forget to send us your "before I die" sexual wish at bxxxx@xxxcom.

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Soulmate or Soul-Sucking Booty Call? You Decide.

2008-07-29T16:19:00.001-07:00

Soul mate is bull shit, its all about sex

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 7/28/08

We got such a great response the last time we threw an advice question over to you guys that we decided we should make it a regular occurrence. Our inbox is overflowing and we'll never get to all the lonely hearts, so each week, one reader's fate will be left up to the masses. Answer this reader's question by filling out the poll after the jump:

Dear Em & Lo,

Okay, so I'm a senior in college and he just graduated from the same school. I've seen him around campus for the past four years and have wanted him oh so badly!! I would read the articles he wrote in our school newspaper, and I would smile and say hi whenever I saw him. But I never actually introduced myself or told him how hot he is because I wasn't exactly sure if he was involved (I saw him around her but didn't exactly know the extent because they're weren't around each other that much) and plus I got nervous when he looked at me and couldn't bring myself to say more than hi.

Okay, so that's the backstory to our situation. Finally this spring, we ran into each other at a Med School party and he introduced himself to me!! We danced and talked the whole night before exchanging numbers. I was so happy!! After that night, we had exams so we didn't get to spend so much time together for a couple weeks. He asked what I wanted in a relationship and whether I was ready for one, I told him no because that was the truth at the time. As time progressed we became friends with benefits. ...

The sex is phenomenal and the company is what I've always wanted. It's been almost four months now and I am ready to be with him. Only one problem: the girl I saw now and again with him back in the day was actually his on-and-off girlfriend for the past four years. She wants him back and calls regularly, she even had her mother call him! We discussed everything and the thing is he likes me a lot and I clearly like him but he's not in love with me and he still has feelings for her though he's not sure if that's because of guilt from breaking her heart in the past or from missing what they were in the beginning. He also said that it's the longest relationship he has been in and doesn't think he'd be able to have another long relationship with another person because he is not a good guy and has commitment issues. So he said that he would give her another chance and see where it goes from there just so that he and she can be sure that it is indeed over.

He asked my take on it and I told him I don't want to lose him and want to let our "relationship" continue to grow, seeing that things are already great and we have so much in common, plus we both like each other and aren't exactly ready to settle down for life just yet. I also told him that I want him to be happy and secure with everything so I support his decision to do what he feels is best, even though he thinks that means going back to her for a while. I meant what I said but I want him back. I have admired him from afar for so long that now it really sucks!! I even went to a psychic (which is so not me) and she said he is my soulmate and I must be very patient with him, in due time he will be mine. Do you think it's true? What do you think I should do? We have agreed to continue the friendship. He said he needs me in his life. He loves my sense of humour and cool demeanor and the fact that I'm so easy to talk to: he loves my company. Funny thing is, these are all the qualities I admire about him too and that's why I agreed to be friends. Is this the right thing to do? What's your take?

--Back-Up Girl

What do you think?
What should Back-Up Girl Do?
( polls)

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What's More Personal: Your Financial or Sexual History?

2008-07-29T16:18:00.001-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 7/29/08

We were just checking out the forthcoming site, Bedposted.com (officially called Bedpost), not least because we wanted to make sure something with such a similar name to ours wasn't about XXX Bed Bath & Beyond porn or something. And to our relief it looks like Bedposted is going to be a stylish way to track your sexual activity; it loftily aspires to "give you some insight into your sex life" (in the tradition of My Black Book). With a tag line like "It's business time," we have high hopes. (More details on Shake Well Before Use.)

But what we found more interesting than the beta countdown was a line in their privacy policy posted on the homepage: "We understand that this is potentially the most personal of data-sets you will ever keep outside of financial records." Which got us thinking, which is more personal info: the details of your sex life or your bank statements (we're not talking passwords and pins, but income and savings, etc.)? Would you be more offended if someone asked you about your sex life or your finances at a dinner party?

Which information is more personal?
( surveys)

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Scientists Prove That Self-Deprecating Humor Trumps Pickup Lines

2008-07-29T16:17:00.001-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 7/29/08

Photo via Splash

No shit, Sherlock, you're probably thinking. But that's because you're wicked smaht and would never attempt to pick up a hottie by asking them how they like their eggs in the morning. And yet, scientists in white lab coats (okay, anthropologists) spent two years studying the role of humor in seduction to come up with a theory that the rest of us figured out during our first Hugh Grant movie: women like it when men make fun of themselves. Men like it too, according to the survey, but women like it more.

The report is called "Dissing Oneself: The Sexual Attractiveness of Self-Dep-Humour" (jee-zuz, they make seduction sound about as exciting a stereo instruction manual). But before you go "dissing" yourself on the pickup scene, the report includes a dire warning that actually made us kinda sad: these methods should not be wielded by someone who is already unpopular. Apparently this could make "low-status individuals" appear "more pathetic" than they were before. In other words, just because it's cute when Hugh Grant does it, doesn't mean we can all pull it off.

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Dark Room Sex Game: Sex With The Lights Off (And Clothes On)

2008-07-23T10:49:00.001-07:00

You"ve used your Wii to improve your baseball game and your bowling skills. So why not play something that"ll actually help you improve something useful, like your ability to achieve mutual orgasm with your partner? Dark Room Sex Game, an "multiplayer, erotic rhythm game without any visuals," allows players to work together to find a rhythm, then gradually speed up until ... well, you get the idea. If the two player mode is a piece of cake, you can witch to "orgy mode" and swap partners to your heart"s content

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Violet Blue + Tyra Banks = Frustration [revealing video]

2008-07-18T08:59:00.001-07:00

Found this old video about how fake these talk shows are This one is from Tyra Banks show. How its all made up. Check the video out.

Voilet Blue says

Check this videoblog entry by Violet Blue about her recent appearance on the Tyra Banks show. Damn. I had hoped for so much more from Tyra. Seems as if Tyra is not as open to women being who they are and more about them being who she / the industry thinks they should be. Very frustrating.

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Gallery of erotic furniture

2008-07-10T08:20:00.001-07:00

via Boing Boing Gadgets by John Brownlee on 7/9/08

A gallery of erotic furniture posted by Der Spiegel inexplicably features shots of both my master bedroom and dining room table. I've already sent a letter to the editor: those shots were clearly tagged "Noncommercial Creative Commons" on Flickr.

Erotic Furniture: Furnishing People's List [Spiegel Online via core77]

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The first ever Commodore 64 LAN party

2008-07-10T08:19:00.001-07:00

This is so amazing..historic geeks.

via Boing Boing Gadgets by John Brownlee on 7/10/08

Inexplicably, the Cincinnati Commodore Computer Club's 2008 C=4 expo was held this year in Fort Mitchell, Kentucky. Although perhaps it's not really such a WTF: being a card-carrying member of any computer club is ignominious enough even when it doesn't involve an obsolescent 26 year old computer. Members of the Cincinnati Commodore Computer Club might well want to have sex in their home town before they die. There's little point in hosing off in the well.

That all said, the latest C=4 expo certainly featured an extraordinary event: the very first Commodore 64 LAN party, in which the homebrew game "NetRacer" programmed by Leif Scheme was played head-to-head by a wonderful octuplet of tucked-shirts-and-jeans beardos on eight networked C64s. Oh, so very wonderful. Check out the site, the pictures are fantastic: these guys all look like they were sucked through a time vortex from 1986 to 2008, clinging with bloody nails to their cherished C64s.

C=4 Expo 2008 [Lyon Labs via Slashdot]

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iPhone 3G Launch, App Store Launch, MobileMe and More...

2008-07-10T08:17:00.001-07:00

via MacRumors : Mac News and Rumors on 7/9/08

Over the next 48 hours, there is going to be an avalanche of news releases and reports regarding the iPhone 3G, MobileMe, App Store, and individual application launches. As always for launch events, MacRumors will accelerate news coverage to report ...

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Calculust

2008-07-10T08:15:00.001-07:00

This is a interesting one

via Daily Bedpost by Dr. Kate on 7/8/08

Sex may be a workout, but is it a truly aerobic one? I was inspired by Em & Lo's post last week wondering just how many calories a sex session can burn. Perhaps unsurprisingly, there's not a lot of research that's been published on the subject, though that hasn't stopped some folks from making precise calculations. My research has revealed the following:

Kissing: 1-2 calories per minute

Foreplay: 1-2 calories per minute (makes me wonder what their foreplay consists of...)

Sex: (generally defined here as intercourse): 2-12 calories per minute. Many estimates say 3-6 calories, and no less an authority than the Kinsey Institute estimates 6 calories per minute.

Other activities (undressing, masturbation) are frequently discussed, but I can't find a reputable source for these estimates.

For a more general idea, the Health Status calculator lets you put in your weight and how many minutes you spend on foreplay and intercourse to see how many calories you burned with your guy last night.

A caveat--the more you weigh, in general the more you can burn.

You may be wondering what about caloric gain during sex? For the sake of completeness, the amount of calories you may take in from your partner's ejaculate is about 5-15. If you're using whipped cream or other treats, though, you'll have to add that up yourself.

So 200 calories at a clip? Possible, but not easy. The bottom line: In order to burn calories, you've really got to get your heart rate up--just feeling your heart race isn't enough. As the Little Book of Calorie Burning advises, think movement, think different positions, think energy, and think passion.

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News to Us: Turns Out We Love a Man in a Cardigan

2008-07-10T08:14:00.001-07:00

He is a cuty

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 7/7/08

Photo via Splash

Yesterday, at the Wimbledon Men's Final, Roger Federer may have lost, but as far as fashion goes, he's a winner in our book. Before that, button-up sweaters were all about Mr. Rogers and drooling old men in retirement homes. Now whenever we see a cardigan, we're going to start drooling.

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For the Love of Blog: 07.03.08

2008-07-10T08:13:00.003-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 7/3/08

A weekly round-up of our own favorite sex-related musings on the Web:

We heart College Humor for this awesome realistic Hollywood sex scene.

The Frisky presents the Most Awesomely Douchey Phone Message Ever.

Bonnie Smolins of American Sexuality hangs five with Perez Hilton and the entire cast of Another Gay Sequel.

On Breakup Girl, Paul the Intern tries to get a little closure.

Babeland warms the cockles of our hearts by talking about butt toys for straight guys.

I Do Sugar introduces us to a whole new way of having "something blue."

On Nerve.com, Kate Carraway is saving herself for her husband. In a round-the-back sorta way.

Also on College Humor, find out what happened when Rick Springfield unveiled his song "Jessie's Girl" to his best friend Jessie.

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Sex Sells, Sometimes

2008-07-10T08:13:00.001-07:00

check out the video

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 7/3/08

You may recall from a recent blog roundup of ours, that Heinz Deli Mayo had a funny television commercial running in the U.K. It featured a tough, macho, N.Y. deli guy in the kitchen making sandwiches for the Brit kids and Dad before they headed out for the day, and ended with the Dad and deli guy giving each other a quick kiss goodbye. But a mere 200 complaints about it being "offensive" and "inappropriate" got it pulled.

Do these poo-poo-ers really think any young person watching this could be turned gay? It's not exactly hot; we mean, there's no tongue or anything. In fact, it's almost kind of sweet. A commercial like that might turn kids tolerant, but gay? No way. In fact, what's offensive about it is simply the automatic assumption that the mom would be the one in the kitchen doing the cooking. Well, at least you can enjoy the ad here or above. And maybe support Heinz by buying some for your barbecue tomorrow.

Planet Green's got a funny commercial with a bit of tasteful nudity to bring awareness to environmental issues and bring viewers to the new television network.

Mega-Bang takes all those penis enhancing products one step further with a parody supplement that'll make your johnson spin. Nice use of the '70s porn aesthetic and the "bullshit Amazonian origins of its "herbs."

And here are just a few oldie-but-goodie commercials that use sex to sell, but not in the typical cheap T&A beer-y way:

Purex has a dirty commercial about making things really clean.

Fiat makes a good case for getting your first car.

Nomad mobile phones wants you to think before committing.

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CrazyBlindDate.com, Dating's Russian Roulette

2008-07-10T08:12:00.001-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 7/2/08

CrazyBlindDate is a fairly new dating site, active in seven cities right now (New York, L.A., Boston, D.C., San Francisco, Chicago and Austin), that lets you set up blind dates very last minute (like for tonight). There are no profiles, no photos--hence the "crazy." Their target market is "really fun, adventurous and spontaneous people...who are trying to get out of a dating rut or just want some kind of 'crazy' night out." We were skeptical (even though we kinda recommended it a few months ago). So we sent some impertinent questions to founder Sam Yagan, the guy behind behind SparkNotes.com, TheSpark.com and OkCupid.com:

Blind dates are notoriously consistently bad. Why the hell would anyone want to do this?

Simply put: most singles don't go on as many dates as they would like. CrazyBlindDate.com offers singles the opportunity to go on a date by doing a minimal amount of work, and unlike blind dates set up by a friend, you'll probably never run into your date again.

One of your frequently asked questions (in the form of a statement) is "I want sex on short notice..."--we would think the percentage of members explicitly hoping for sex out of the date in their date request is pretty high. What is it?

It's very, very low--so low that I've never bothered to count. If you want sex on short notice, there are plenty of other sites that get you what you're looking for.

Since there's no exchange of pics or any communication prior, we'd guess CrazyBlindDate would attract those who can't get a date with typical online dating, because they're socially inept or, to be frank, a bit hard on the eyes. Is that true, and if so, how can you ensure a potential user that you won't set them up with a psycho supernerd who's a 35-year-old virgin with bad hair and a goiter?...

Ah, quite the contrary. CrazyBlindDate.com tends to appeal to the more adventurous & outgoing--your typical supernerd is going to be horrified by the prospect of meeting a stranger! We do extensive rating of our users on both physical and personality axes, so we're often able to match more attractive people with other attractive people. Here are some stats from a survey of the first 1,000 dates:

Did you feel a romantic connection with any of your CrazyBlindDates?
- Yes/Somewhat: 37.9 percent

Have you spoken to friends on the phone or in person about your CrazyBlindDate?
- Yes: 86.5 percent

Which of the following best describes your opinion of CrazyBlindDate?
- Top 2 on a 5 point scale: 85.2 percent

We understand it's a new site and you probably don't have many success stories, but on the Successes page you just have people's names paired up. WTF? Where are the stories, the graphic details, the juicy bits?

Here are some testimonials:
- We had a great time! We could definitely be great friends. There was not much of a physical connection. I have to say I have never felt so unflitered with anyone else on a first date. We had so much to talk about because we knew literally nothing about each other.
- I am currently dating someone I met through CBD.
- I have met a couple of really great guys that I will hang out with again. I primarily wanted to do this to meet new people and expand my horizons so mission accomplished.
- I met a really cool, fun guy and now we're really good friends!
- I had a SUPER romantic kiss with one of my dates at the Bart station
- I had a great conversation with an interesting person. Nothing came of it romantically, but it was still a fun way to spend a Friday night!
- My VERY picky/selective friend had a fantastic date her first time with CBD. I think it's because she couldn't actually pre-screen and therefore gave a great guy a chance who she would have otherwise passed over (if he had an online profile or something that she could have learned about him from).
- Jokingly, I challenged my prospective date to Google everything they could about cranberry bogging. My first blind date showed up with a bag of cranberries.
- The very first CBD lasted for about 5 hours of talking and getting to know the other. We are still dating.

You must get some pretty funny horror stories. Obviously it's bad for biz to post those, but could you please please please share one with us? Pretty please?

Here's a bunch:
- My date took two Viagra while we were out (even after I told him I wasn't going home with him).
- One guy called his bank for 20 minutes on our date.
- The guy said that he would get the beers. (We each had one). He ordered chicken wings, knowing that I am vegetarian, and then he told the waitress to split the check in half.
- Text messaged me the following, two minutes before the date: "Sorry, death in the family, can't make it! Call me!"
- My date described himself as Matt Damon. He looked like a bloated Bill Gates.
- The crab fisherman who missed our date cuz he was out at sea. I am pretty sure he was not kidding.
- Girl showed up in workout clothes, and waited until the end to say she's not looking for anything serious...and never wants to see me again.
- On my first date I texted ahead that I was wearing a white cardigan. AJ & I met up and he said, "I'm glad I found you, I didn't know what you meant about a white cardimon." I said, "Cardigan. I'm wearing a white cardigan." He said, "Yeah, I had no idea what that was." I said, "It's a sweater." He said, "I don't know much about women's fashion." That really set the tone for everything we talked about. EVERYTHING.

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One Woman's Trash Is Another Woman's Treasure?

2008-07-10T08:11:00.001-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 7/1/08

ExBoyfriendJewelry.com is where the broken-hearted go to dump those sparkly yet painful reminders of love lost. Whether or not you're in the market for a new watch or pendant, it's worth a visit just for the stories that accompany each item (what's known as "the scoop" on the site). There's the expected funny-bitter stuff like, "The ring is beautiful, the man sucked!" but it's the surprisingly sad tales that really get you. One woman's boyfriend gave her a ring he charged to HER account while he was cheating on her with his own cousin ("true!"). Another's crack-addicted husband spent their 3-day-old baby's cash gift from the grandparents, so she split with the guy and is selling all his stuff just to make ends meet. One woman's story ends, "I ran away after he hit me again."

Man. It feels almost like a public service to buy some jewelry off the site just to help out your fellow woman. But certainly some users have figured that the sadder the story, the more likely the sale...? A bit cynical, we know. At least you get something shiny out of it that you can call my Precious. Just don't give it to your partner as a token of your affection. Like our intern Joanna said, that would surely carry bad relationship karma.

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BBC : My Big Breasts and Me : How big is good ?. Video

2008-07-01T08:33:00.001-07:00

British women has biggest breast in the whole europe.

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Stuff so raunchy, it's illegal

2008-07-01T08:26:00.001-07:00

Today's question: Should there be an obscenity law that outlaws a product that is made with informed adult consent with no laws being broken, and that is increasingly distributed and consumed in complete privacy? All week, Barry McDonald and John Stagliano debate obscenity and the 1st Amendment.

Website Snapshot

Stuff so raunchy, it's illegal - Los Angeles Times

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The Best Bill Gates Parodies Ever [Bill Gates Retirement Party]

2008-06-25T17:26:00.001-07:00

via Gizmodo by Christopher Mascari on 6/25/08

So what does Bill Gates really have to show for his years of hard work? Sure he built a software empire, and yeah he has been known as the richest man alive. But those things aren't as cool as being immortalized on film and in song. Maybe. Either way, he's been cartooned, acted, clayed, and even sung about. So with Bill's retirement only days away, we thought it was only fitting we gave you a mash-up of all these green sweater, glasses wearin' characters.

If you didn't already guess which videos were used above, here's a list. There's The Simpsons, Celebrity Death Match, South Park, 2DTV, Freakazoid and of course Pirates of Silicon Valley.

What about the song you say? Well, it's by a group called, wait for it, Komputer. The song is titled, wait for it, "Bill Gates", and is the third track on their 1997 album The World of Tomorrow. If you can't seem to get the song out of your head, you can buy it on both iTunes and Amazon.com.

At the end of this week Bill Gates will leave his post at Microsoft, but his various TV and film characters will live on forever. Since Ballmer will be taking over, we can only hope that he gets the same treatment, cause a crazy-ass cartoon character of that guy would be hilarious.
Add vids we missed in the comments.
[Bill Gates' Retirement Party on Giz]

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Dog's Head Being Kept Alive via Machine [Science]

2008-06-25T17:25:00.001-07:00

Spooky

via Gizmodo by Adam Frucci on 6/25/08

In the unsettling video found after the jump, Soviet scientists in the mid-20th century keep the severed head of a dog alive via an "autojector," a primitive heart and lung machine. The dog reacts to sounds, opens its eyes, eats, licks its lips, and generally looks alive. The video has been debated by experts for years, but now you can be the judge thanks to the wonders/horrors of the internet. So, what say you? Is this poor pooch surviving sans body, or is another Ruskie trick? Either way, I'm sure we can all agree on one thing: holy f'ing shit.

Yikes. To make you feel better, might I suggest revisiting the adorable bionic puppy? [Environmental Graffiti via io9]

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Giz Explains: How the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation Will Save the World ...

2008-06-25T17:24:00.001-07:00

via Gizmodo by matt buchanan on 6/25/08

Bill Gates is officially "transitioning" from Microsoft this week, but really, he checked out a long time ago. His Big Hairy Vision isn't just modernizing the world anymore—it's saving it. The Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation is the world's largest charitable foundation, with a current asset trust endowment of $37.3 billion. Last year, it gave away $2 billion. Its work is divided into three major programs: Global Development, Global Health and United States. It's not your average charity though—and not just because two of its three trustees, Bill and Warren (no last names needed) constantly jockey for the title of world's richest man. It's the smartest. And that's why it just might succeed.

Let's start with the goals of each program. The Global Health program is, no surprise, all about fighting disease, in two ways. One, making vaccines and medicine more readily available. Two, good ol' R&D to develop new vaccines—vaccine development and access takes up half of the Global Health program's money—plus treatments and other higher-tech solutions, the stuff that actually gets Bill excited now.

Global Development has three prongs, with the overarching mission of attacking poverty and hunger: Providing financial aid, spreading internet access as wide as possible, and helping small farmers with crop production and getting food to market.

The U.S. program is all about education, like its $1.37 billion grant to the United Negro College Fund via the Gates Millennium Scholars Program.

The foundation's goals don't sound so much different from anyone else's—they're big, lofty and impossible. What's so brilliant? They're not charging at the world's problems scattering its massive war chest around willy-nilly. They invest in solutions. Take access to clean water (or the lack thereof). The Seattle PI notes in a piece today that the foundation has spent years looking at the problem, but has yet to pump money into a major water project, because simply building pipes won't really crack at the root problem. Sylvia Mathews Burwell, director of the Global Development Program, says in the article that "what we look for is the project has to be scalable, sustainable and catalytic." (Its hardcore focus on vaccines makes total sense from this angle.)

In other words, it plants tons of little techno-seeds and showers them with love and money until they grow to be totally independent and self-sustaining, and doesn't waste its largesse on stuff that's a temporary fix. To keep up the plant metaphor, rather than hoping to grow a single, giant tree of awesome that stretches over all the problems they're trying to fix, they're planting a ton of little, carefully planned and managed trees to make a, um, forest of awesome. It's an approach borrowed from drug companies, which invest in lotsa different drugs simultaneously, not just one miracle drug at a time.

Not that they're cheap—in his person of the year story, Time says that the Gates spent 2005 "giving more money away faster than anyone ever has," It's just that every penny of it is invested with the same sharpness Bill applied to Microsoft in its golden days, so each one works as hard as possible, like the $1.5 billion grant for the Global Alliance for Vaccines and Immunization.

Above and beyond all of that, Bill's philanthropy is nudging other people to chip in. Most famously, Warren Buffet is giving most of his fortune to the Foundation because he believes in its goals and smart, practicable approach to charity. As long as Bill's got the passion—like he did for Microsoft in his past life—then yeah, he just might save the world.

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Build Your Own iPhone Anti-Interference Shield With a Can of Red Bull [DIY]

2008-06-25T17:23:00.001-07:00

Awesome!.

via Gizmodo by Sean Fallon on 6/25/08

One of the things that irritates me about iPhone ownership is how my computer speakers buzz whenever the phone gets too close. It wouldn't be that big of a deal except for the fact that my desk is the most logical place to charge my phone. Fortunately, someone has come up with a simple MacGyver-esque solution to this problem using nothing more than a Red Bull can and some double stick tape. The creator warns that it could interfere with your reception, but it shouldn't pose much of a problem. Besides, your desk is probably littered with empty soda cans as it is. Hit the link for the full set of instructions. [Project Page]

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Zoomdoggle.com: Are We Having Fun Yet?

2008-06-25T17:22:00.001-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 6/25/08

Jake Bronstein once did us a solid by stripping down to his birthday suit, donning a French maid's apron, and serving cocktails at Em's bachelorette party. He didn't know us (he was a friend of a friend), but he's the kind of guy who'll try just about anything for a laugh. So it's no surprise his new project, Zoomdoggle.com, is all about the pursuit of fun for fun's sake.

On the homepage there's the suggestion of adding a "B" and an "R" to the beginning and end, respectively, of the word ONE on a dollar bill. Zoomdoggle's sex writer submits himself to weekly Truth or Dare challenges from readers. And Jake does all sorts of scheming, like getting an average Joe a date with a model and trying to manufacture missed connections. One "doggler" even dressed up as a semi-naked Indian and tried to ambush the Naked Cowboy in Times Square.

Good times, good times.

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Christen Clifford's BabyLove

2008-06-25T17:21:00.001-07:00

Sad but true

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 6/24/08

Photo: Kristin Hoebermann

Before Christen Clifford started talking dirty about her parents' sex life, she was getting everyone's knickers in a twist by talking dirty about being a parent. Yeah, she said "mother" and "sex" in the same sentence. Call the family values brigade! Her show BabyLove is currently Off-Broaday; it's showing Tuesdays and Sundays at 45 Bleecker until July 27. If you're outside NYC, you can catch her musings on the topic at her blog, where she took part in Babeland's Sexy Mama Blog project.

Em & Lo: So tell us about your show...

Christen Clifford: BabyLove is a solo comedy about maternal sexuality: everything from trying to conceive to masturbating while breastfeeding; from the humiliations of postpartum sex to the eroticism of parenthood.

What made you want to write about this topic?

After I had my son Felix, I was confused about my body, my relationship with my husband, and the intimacy I shared with my newborn son. My sexuality was so changed by motherhood. I'm a reader and writer, so I turned to books and didn't find women's sexual experience addressed to my satisfaction.

Why do you think people get so het up about motherhood and sexuality in the same sentence?

Power. The power of procreation and the power of sexuality combined is a pretty strong bomb. Maybe that's why I love being pregnant so much...because I feel truly strong and powerful and creative. I also think that our society is so sexually permissive in so many ways, but still so Puritan. Breasts can be seen on billboards but not in an advertisement for breastfeeding. That's what they are for!

Has the reaction to the show changed now that you're Off-Broadway--are your audiences more easily shocked now than your early downtown-NYC audiences?

I do get more conservative audiences who are shocked by how explicit the show is--but it's not explicitness for its own sake, it's explicit in an attempt to portray sexuality honestly. I do my best to win them over and I usually succeed. I try to set myself up as the extreme example that I hope most people can find a sliver of their own experience in. And everything I talk about in this show is true, and I think audiences, no matter what their background, relate to someone telling the truth.

What's been the most negative reaction to this show?

The most negative reaction was actually when it was published on Nerve.com, some readers wrote in that I should have my son taken away from me, that Protective Services should be called, that my husband should divorce me and get full custody...it was very scary and hurtful and I didn't sleep for days...because I wrote about the intimate physical relationship with my son.

But I get so many more people who say things like, "Thank you for telling it like it is! " or "Now I don't feel so alone and crazy anymore." One woman wrote to me and said that she and husband stayed up all night talking after seeing the show, that they were finally able to talk about how becoming parents had affected their sex life after seeing BabyLove. And they were able to laugh at me and therefore at themselves--I was so moved by this, it really made me feel like I was doing good in the world!

Can you share the story about getting interrupted by the FedEx guy while masturbating...

Let's just say it proved to me that motherhood and sex didn't go together. [Ed: You can get the unabridged version here.]

So...what was that you were saying about the eroticism of breastfeeding...

Well, this amazing little being came out of my body and was now eating my body. The fat from my thighs was literally transferring to his thighs. Breastfeeding was the most physically intimate experience I ever had. Plus, it's physics--that small mouth has a lot of suction! It's pleasurable; there is a biological imperative for us to keep the species going.

You say that you found your first pregnancy a super-sexy experience but afterward struggled a bit...so what's the secret to sex after kids?

Oh God, I don't have any answers, it's different for everyone. Humor. Time. Marriage counseling. Scheduled sex. Talking. I'm doing my best to not sweat the small stuff, as they say--which is particularly hard when I'm clearly right about everything all the time.

You're pregnant again, right? Has it been the same with this pregnancy? Or is pregnant sex not quite the same when you've already got one kid around?

Yes, I'm in my second trimester (the horny trimester!) and we're putting our son to bed later so we can have alone time in the morning. I'm one of those women who loves being pregnant. The hormones agree with me, I love my changed body, the bigger breasts, all that extra blood flowing. I feel very womanly. And there's a sense of my sexuality being respected and socially sanctioned, which is a strange feeling...it's kind of like having a big hickey that everybody's okay with.

For more information, visit BabyLovethePlay.com.

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WSJ: Android Is A Giant, Delayed Flustercuck, iPhone Easier to Develop For [...

2008-06-23T12:11:00.001-07:00

Now you talk about it. Google do not get usability like apple does. Infact no one ever gets like apple does. thats why iPhone is piece of work and Android based phones and apps will take lot of effort to get there.

via Gizmodo by matt buchanan on 6/23/08

Oh, Android delays, let us count the ways: T-Mobile will probably deliver an Android phone by the end of the year, but the WSJ says that working with T-Mo is sucking up so much Google juice that Sprint will have to wait until 2009 (and its Android phone might not play on EV-DO, but WiMax). AT&T is still holding off. China Mobile, the world's largest carrier, wanted one by fall, but it's looking more like 2009. Software developers are struggling to pump out programs and say that the iPhone is way easier to develop for. So, uh, what's going on in Googleland?

A lot of has to do with the fact that Android itself is still baking—it's hard to develop for an OS that isn't totally set and firm to the touch. So, even though Google has lotsa cool prototypes like one "a long touch-screen, similar to the Apple iPhone, a swivel-out full keyboard, and a trackball for navigation similar to the kind on some BlackBerrys," developers are having to constantly rewrite apps because the OS is in flux.

The Weather Channel admits it has already had to "rewrite a few things," and the latest version of Android is going to require some of the biggest revisions yet. The iPhone's SDK on the other hand, is ready to go, and many developers are already familiar with OS X. (And if developers are choosing one platform over the other, that's where Android's real trouble starts.) Topping it off, phonemakers like Samsung aren't having a jolly time integrating it either.

Sprint's woes are in part due to the fact it wants an Android phone with Sprint services, rather than a generic Google-y one. Because of the pushback, they might skip over a 3G Android phone and just do a WiMax one (though that doesn't make much sense to us—the EV-DO footprint is and will be way bigger than gimpy WiMax's, even in the first half of 2009, and that's being optimistic). Curiously, no word on the newly open Verizon's front, but given how messy Android is right now, even with all of its promise, we can't really blame AT&T for sitting it out for now. [WSJ]

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Daft Punk's Designer Shows DIY Glowing Outfit Tricks [Glow]

2008-06-23T12:09:00.001-07:00

via Gizmodo by Kit Eaton on 6/23/08

Almost as famous as Daft Punk's electro-tunes are their glowing electro-outfits. And now, thanks to the chap who made clothes for their 2007 Alive tour, and an Instructables DIY page you too could don glowing gear. It looks fairly easy, as long as you're nifty with a needle and thread: the hardest part seems to be soldering the wire's electric contacts. There're a bunch of tips on wire placing and sewing, and photos of EL wire patterns on everything from boots to hats. And now, if you excuse me, I'm off to persuade my missus of the benefits of a glowing bra. [Instructables via Hacknmod]

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College Confessional: Growing Up With a Feminist Father

2008-06-23T12:06:00.003-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 6/17/08

With Father's Day this past Sunday, our intern Ariel Servadio talks about how cool dads don't freak when you work here:

When I was little, my father read me a book from his childhood, Friday the Arapaho Indian by A.M. Anderson. I heard the "true story" of a young Native American girl named Friday and her historical adventures. But if you've ever read Anderson's book, you'll know what I discovered when I was much older and my dad confessed the truth: Friday the Indian was a boy.

As a sleepy child, I heard the story of a powerful and adventurous young woman doing extraordinary things--and I believed it. As my father painstakingly changed pronouns and altered sex-related details while reading to me every night before bed, he planted the seed of limitless possibilities in my brain. It wasn't until I was nine years old that that idea was challenged: It was the end of third grade and the elementary-school music teacher was preparing our class for joining the school band the next year. When we were asked what instruments we would like to play, I raised my hand and said I wanted to play the bass guitar. "No," the music teacher replied, "I need big, strong boys to play the guitar next year." So I got stuck playing the alto saxophone. At least it wasn't the flute, I guess...

This idea of boys being big and strong and able to do things that girls couldn't was new to me. Both my parents took a proactive role in teaching me I was capable of anything and everything, but my dad went above and beyond what was usually expected of a father-daughter relationship. He taught me skills that many would reserve for only a son: I know how to fire a gun, drive a dirt bike, skin an animal, clean a fish, rappel down a tree, fight with martial arts and defensive tactics--the list goes on. He bought me just as many chemistry sets and microscopes and sports supplies as he did Easy-Bake Ovens. He wasn't afraid to talk to me about sex or the processes of the female reproductive system, either.

I distinctly remember being about four when I watched my first informative video about the birds and the bees--a cartoon featuring a man and woman with squiggly-drawn genitalia. My mother says that was all my father's idea. And when I got my first period at 11 years old, my mother was in the hospital busy having my little brother, so I had to go home and tell my father what had happened to me in school that day. For many of my peers it would no doubt have been a traumatic event, yet for me it was completely comfortable and natural to talk about it with my dad. Because he never made sex ed weird, or made me feel ashamed about going through puberty, I think I've always had a healthy outlook on sex--one that's made me curious and confident and responsible (and, needless to say, brave enough to intern at a sex blog).

I grew up thinking that the world was my oyster, thanks in particular to my father. I don't think he would actually ever describe himself as a feminist--I've rarely heard him use the word. But I know that he is, because I am.

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Great British Sex Slip-Ups

2008-06-23T12:06:00.001-07:00

(danctags british sex slip-ups)

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 6/16/08

Maybe it's because we've been making a TV show about sex with a bunch of Brits for the past couple of months (they just have a way of talking about butt plugs that's so charming), but we actually found ourselves forwarding a "Check out this it's hilarious!!!!" e-mail this week: It's titled "12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres ever aired on British TV and radio" and, well, it kind of speaks for itself. For the record, "fanny" (#12) doesn't mean quite the same thing over here in Blighty, and one certainly doesn't speak of "fanny packs" in polite company. You're welcome.

1. Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator:
"And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!"

2. New Zealand rugby commentator:
"Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him."

3. Ted Walsh, horseracing commentator:
"This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother."

4. Harry Carpenter at the 1977 Oxford-Cambridge boat race:
"Ah, isn't that nice. The wife of the Cambridge president is kissing the cox of the Oxford crew."

5. US PGA commentator:
"One of the reasons Arnie [Arnold Palmer] is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them. ... Oh my god!! What have I just said??"

6. Carenza Lewis on Time Team Live, about finding food in the Middle Ages:
"You'd eat beaver if you could get it."

7. A female news anchor, to the weatherman, the day after it was supposed to snow and didn't:
"So, Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?"

8. Steve Ryder covering the US Masters:
"Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69 yesterday."

9. Clare Frisby on Look North, talking about a jumbo hot dog:
"There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this."

10 Mike Hallett on Sky Sports, discussing missed snooker shots:
"Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets."

11. Michael Buerk on watching Philippa Forrester cuddle up to a male astronomer for warmth during BBC1's UK eclipse coverage:
"They seem cold out there. They're rubbing each other and he's only come in his shorts."

12. Ken Brown on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunesson lining up shots at the Scottish Open:
"Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny; other weeks he prefers to do it by himself."

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Advice: Booty Call Tips for the Ladies

2008-06-21T17:03:00.001-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 6/18/08

Dear Em & Lo,
I read your "Sex Advice Review: Worst Booty Call Tips Ever" with amusement and agreement. But what are YOUR booty call tips, for a woman?
Thanks,
Keeping it Casual

Dear K.I.C.,

Wow, where to start? We could go on all day about booty call etiquette (in fact, we have: Check out our book Sex Etiquette for Ladies and Gentlemen if you want the unabridged version of our answer). But here are just a few highlights that we think are particularly pertinent to the ladies:

• A regular booty call partner can be much more satisfying for a woman than a string of one-night stands, because it usually takes a few sessions to teach a new man the various routes to your happy place. And if you're not demanding orgasms from your casual sex, then you're kinda missing the point, aren't ya?

• You've got to be attracted to your booty call partner, and it helps if you can have a laugh together, but you don't need to have anything else in common. (And you certainly don't have to seek out "inner beauty.") So go ahead and call that himbo. In fact, the less like "boyfriend material" he is, the better suited he is to be your booty call.

• Don't limit your booty-calling to just exes. Sure, an ex can make a great booty call candidate, but just because you're over him enough to want just booty, it doesn't mean he is (though he may pretend he is just for the chance to be in your presence again). Don't break his heart all over again, the poor little lamb! And you should definitely steer clear of booty-calling an ex who broke YOUR heart.

• We know you like to plan, but never make a booty call more than a day in advance. An hour or two is considered foreplay, any longer feels too relationshippy.

• Make sure you're alternating who calls whom so that mutual interest is constantly re-established. If you've been the initiator more than three times without reciprocation, give it a rest.

• Tipsy is good, stumbling drunk is bad.

• BOTH parties should be armed with prophylactics at all times. Yep, that includes you.

• Faking belongs in dysfunctional relationships and miserable one-night stands only. In the modern booty call, everyone gets at least one real one, whether delivered by oneself or by the second party.

• Don't call your fuck buddy just to say "hi" (unless you were friends for more than a month before you started swapping favors). Save the niceties for email.

• If nothing is discussed, you've got to assume that you're not the only booty call in your fuck buddy's life. If you want to be in a monogamous booty call situation, then say so!

• Do not think that six months of booty-calling each other connotes progression. Duration never implies acceleration, change, or growth--it is simply the same dirty thing happening over and over. A booty call matures into a bona fide relationship about as often as Fox's 11 p.m. headlining news item is truly newsworthy.

Keeping it real,

Em & Lo

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(What I Know About) My Parents' Sex Life

2008-06-21T17:02:00.003-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 6/19/08

Photo: Justine Cooper

Christen Clifford is a performer and writer whose controversial show BabyLove (it's about motherhood and sexuality...more on that next week) is now Off Broadway. Her newest show, (What I Know About) My Parents' Sex Life goes to the other end of the spectrum: elder sex. (We hear you saying "ewww" in the back row there.) It runs for four performances starting tonight at soloNOVA at P.S. 122 in NYC.

Em & Lo: Can you describe this show in a nutshell?

Christen Clifford: It's a mixture of what I know about my parents' sex life, what I imagine about it, my erotic feelings toward them, and also about elderly sexuality in the U.S. in general.

Why do you think so many people are grossed out by elder sex? Were you, when you first started thinking about this show?

I'm not grossed out by it at all. Sexuality and sensuality don't disappear as you age. I don't want to give up my sexual life just because of age and the medical difficulties that it sometimes brings.

And why do you think so many people have a problem with the idea of their own parents having sex in particular? We should be happy for them, right? Yet why do so many of us find it so disturbing?

I can't speak for anyone else, but like most people, I thought of my parents as sexless. Then when my father died I found his medical records, which showed that he had requested a prescription for Viagra not long after my mother died. He stated that he had not had sex since she went into a nursing home, and that meant they had been having sex before she went into the nursing home, when she was quite ill.

I was definitely disturbed by this, but then fascinated and happy for them that their sexual life had continued through old age and illness. It's certainly what I would want for myself, though it took a bit of thinking to come to this conclusion!

Is this why there is so little research into mature sexuality?

I think older people are seen as sexless in our society. The first large-scale study of sexuality in adults over the age of 57 (the largest growing segment of the U.S. population) was just released last year. And I think societal attitudes equate sexuality with youth and fertility, and the media certainly reinforces this idea, when in truth everyone has a sexual life that changes throughout the course of a lifetime.

Do you think senior citizens are having more sex these days? If so, what are some of the consequences of this change?

People are living longer, healthier lives. This does bring about problems: NBC reported that 20 percent of new HIV cases are in senior citizens! Most doctors don't ask if their older patients are sexually active or teach them about STDs. They should.

So, Viagra: a good thing for elder sex, or a bummer for women who thought they were done with sex with their husbands?

Dunno, it depends, I've heard both sides of that argument. I just think it would be nice if a little bit of that research money were put into women's sexual response.

So, we have to ask: what's the deal with granny porn?

My favorite title is "Fuck Me Like It's 1945." It's reassuring in some way.

Do you think you'll still be having sex with you're 70? 80? 90?

I hope so. Maybe my husband and I will get into a sexually permissive nursing home! We'll put on some Prince and I'll say "Fuck me like it's 1999, honey, only be careful of your heart."

Which do you think you're more likely to be indulging in as a senior citizen: sex or masturbation? Or a healthy balance of the two?

I suspect I'll still be doing both, just like I do now. The libido never gives up.

P.S. 122 and soloNOVA present

(What I Know About) My Parents' Sex Life

a.k.a. Fuck Me Like It's 1945

written and performed by Christen Clifford

Thursday, June 19 @ 9 p.m.

Saturday, June 21 @ 9 p.m.

Sunday, June 22 @ 4 p.m.

Wednesday, June 25 @ 9 p.m.

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Sugasm: The Way to Know What's Happening on Other Sex Blogs

2008-06-21T17:02:00.001-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by DailyBedpost.com on 6/20/08

The best of this week's blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #137? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you're all set.

This Week's Picks
69
"Frozen, I wait for your next move."

Balanced on the tip of my tongue
"Pushing her into the bedroom, I stripped her bare swiftly, laid her out on the bed."

Impertinent Question: Do You Enjoy Spanking?
"That's what we call Wednesday night!"

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Sugar Bank

Editor's Choice
The Source of All Waters

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot's Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

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Sex and Shopping

2008-06-18T20:04:00.001-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 6/17/08

A recent survey in the U.K. claims to have found that women think about shopping almost as much as men think about sex--every 60 seconds and every 52 seconds, respectively. Of course, this survey was conducted by Cosmopolitan.co.uk, so it's not exactly hard science (and we're guessing that Cosmo's readers like to shop more than your average gal...how many urbane tomboys are browsing that particular site?). We'd like to think that the female readers of our site are a little more balanced in their tastes. We're crossing our fingers that you prove us right...

Ladies, which do you think about more: sex or shopping?
( polls)

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Poll: Ladies, Would You Wear This T-shirt?

2008-06-18T20:03:00.001-07:00

Oh I love these , I'm gonna get one.

via Daily Bedpost by Em & Lo on 6/16/08

Our favorite sexist pig Steve Santagati--self-proclaimed Bad Boy, author of "The MANual," and Bedpost Interviewee--made a cool gray T-shirt to wear on his book tour with a skull and crossbones and the words "Bad Boys Finish First" on it. People loved it, so now he's gone into the T-shirt biz to push his philosophy that "men should be men and women should be pro-active," one T-shirt at a time. He's just come out with a bunch of new slogans and styles, which include the charming one pictured above (about which you can inquire via his T-shirt page; the official site is under construction as of this post).

So we just have to ask: Who would wear this? The only person we can think of is a politically conservative, 45+, Texan woman with an addiction to plastic surgery and a sugar daddy who thinks climate change is a myth. But then, we wouldn't have thought so many gals would choose to wear the word "juicy" on their asses, evoking images of a post-Taco-Bell-run case of, well, the runs. Are we terribly out of touch? Or do we just have taste? Do tell...

What do you think of this T-shirt?
( polls)

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From ElasticWaist.com: Food Porn is Exactly Like Doing It Porn

2008-06-18T20:02:00.001-07:00

via Daily Bedpost by elasticwaist.com on 6/18/08

You've seen the word "porn" dropped in as a descriptive suffix before, right? Anything that lovingly, devotedly, lavishly, and sensually captures a particular concept, or hobby, or thing, gets dubbed thing-porn. HGTV is all about the decorating porn, and TLC is all about the life porn (a show about midgets! a show about weddings! a show about babies! a show about midgets who get married and have 34 babies!), and the Food Network I'm sure you have heard described casually as "food porn."

According to this classic Harper's article, the connection doesn't seem entirely as casual or coincidental, as clever a throwaway descriptor, as we'd think:

more at ElasticWaist.com>>

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5 Reasons to Buy the Apple iPhone 3G

2008-06-17T09:05:00.003-07:00

And Im buying one , will give the current one to my dog.

via The Best Article Every day by bspcn on 6/10/08

Written by Melissa J. Perenson

Now may be the time to become an Apple iPhone owner at last.

When the iPhone was introduced, I found it tempting … very, very tempting. But just enough features and capabilities were missing from Apple’s initial cell phone offering that I held off on buying one.

I wasn’t alone in waiting, but that doesn’t mean the first-generation iPhone didn’t sell well. In fact, the iPhone moved 6 million units worldwide, well enough to make Apple extremely competitive in the smart-phone market.

Regardless of whether you stood in line on launch day or you chose to sit the first round out, today’s announcement probably got your attention. It certainly has tongues wagging everywhere. Apple is once again in the spotlight, and that has everything to do with the iPhone 3G features the company revealed today. Should you queue up when the iPhone 3G becomes available on July 11? Read on.

1. Price

The original iPhone was innovative and groundbreaking. It also was an expensive toy. Sure, around the country both technophiles and the masses lined up to procure the original iPhone, but at $599 and $699 for the 8GB and 16GB models, respectively, the audience remained somewhat limited. As time passed, as the models’ prices dropped, and as the device’s reputation spread, the iPhone picked up more steam. But even Jobs himself admitted that about 50 percent of people surveyed who didn’t buy an iPhone said that they didn’t because of price.

With Apple’s iPhone price drop, announced today, you pay significantly less money up front at the time of purchase: The 8GB iPhone will sell for $199, just one-third the price that the 4GB iPhone sold for at launch a year ago. The 16GB model will sell for $299.

Those prices put Apple’s smart phone into the reach of more consumers than ever before. Only four handsets on our current Top 10 smart phones chart–Palm’s Centro ($100 with a Sprint contract, $200 with an AT&T contract), T-Mobile’s Shadow ($200 with contract) and Dash ($150 with contract), and RIM’s BlackBerry Pearl ($150 with a T-Mobile contract)–cost less than the least expensive iPhone. And the iPhone 3G, with its integrated audio and video player, Web browsing, and GPS, offers far more versatility than any of those competing phones.

2. 3G Browsing Speed

One of the biggest drawbacks of using a mobile phone for Web activities is the lag time. Much as point-and-shoot digital cameras frustrate their users with seemingly interminable shutter lag, cell phone users roll their eyes at how long it can take for a Web page to load.

The first-gen iPhone notably omitted 3G wireless in favor of the more widely available–and significantly slower–EDGE connectivity. A year later, 3G seems even more necessary than before, as Web pages grow more graphically intensive.

Now that a 3G-capable iPhone has been unveiled, it’s hard to imagine going back to not having 3G. According to Apple, Web pages will load up to 2.8 times faster. That’s a compelling argument: I’ve waited for what felt like hours for a PC World Shopping price-comparison page to load on my old EDGE-based Treo when I’ve been shopping in a store, for example. I’d much rather get the information I want sooner, rather than twiddling my thumbs and reaching for a cup of coffee.

Unfortunately, 3G wireless service on AT&T has one catch: AT&T Wireless’s service plans for the iPhone 3G will follow the company’s standard pricing structure, which means that you’ll be paying for whatever pricing plan you choose plus AT&T’s unlimited 3G data services ($30 a month for personal use, $45 a month for business use). Individual users will see their iPhone bill jump by $10.

3. Greater International Support

From a multilingual keyboard that you can change out on the fly to a user-removable SIM card (a SIM-card ejector comes with the iPhone 3G), new features in this model make it much more viable for international use. Whether you need to access the Web while overseas, or you want to swap out your SIM card (presumably, after an unspecified period of time, AT&T will let its customers unlock the phone for international use, as the company has allowed with its more standard phones), this model is better than the original.

4. Applications Galore

Based on what I saw at the WWDC Keynote, Apple’s approach to application development may pay off in spades. Developing applications appears simple, limited only by the constraints of developers’ imaginations. Distributing the software through iTunes is genius–turning to a single repository to procure content is far easier than scouring the Web for random Symbian, Palm, Windows Mobile, or BlackBerry apps you may want to download.

I see tremendous potential for useful–and downright fun–applications to come out of the development process now that the iPhone software developer’s kit is available. The potential for future apps, coupled with the iPhone’s existing programs–its iPod video and audio capabilities, its photo album, its easy e-mail, its Google Maps and YouTube apps–makes the iPhone 3G a unique offering in the mobile arena.

5. iPhone: Still at the Head of the Class

A funny thing happened in the past year: For all the hoopla, for all the assertions that the iPhone was a game-changer, the truth is, not much has changed in the landscape of the cell phone universe in the past year. It’s almost as if Apple is so far ahead in its innovation and thinking that it has a seemingly insurmountable lead over its competitors, and is in a realm of its own as a result.

The reality is, none of the so-called iPhone killers have come close to challenging the iPhone’s media handling and ease of use. That could change in the coming months as more cell phone vendors introduce updates to their lines (RIM, for example, is rumored to be working on a touch-screen interface, though its next flagship model, the BlackBerry Bold, does not have a touch screen). In the meantime, however, Apple will just be building on its solid head start.

Admittedly, not everyone will want–or need–to buy an iPhone 3G. For one thing, the much-anticipated iPhone 2.0 software upgrade that will enable the App Store for downloading applications, announced earlier this year, will be free to all first-generation-iPhone owners.

Furthermore, some people may want to hold out for a more substantial hardware upgrade, such as additional storage, a better camera, or other heretofore unimagined hardware bonuses.

I may queue up for an iPhone 3G. Or I may be patient and wait for the next big thing–which for me would be inclusion of features like 32GB of memory.

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10 Things You Probably Didn’t Know About Cell Phones

2008-06-17T09:05:00.001-07:00

via The Best Article Every day by bspcn on 6/13/08

Written by Mobilecommandos

Just when we feel comfortable enough to say “wow, cell phones have really changed the way we operate,” things get even weirder. Here are 10 facts about cells from around the world that show the scale and style of our contemporary global use; sometimes for bad, but sometimes for real, cool, innovative good.

1. There Are LOTS of Them

There are half as many active cell phones on the planet as there are people. When you think of the general wealth distribution across the planet, it’s pretty remarkable to have over 3.3 billion active mobiles. Then again, Luxembourg’s mobile phone penetration rate is 158%. Yep - that’s 158 active cell phones for every 100 people.

Source

2. And They Make a Mess

125+ million phones are discarded every year. Given the rate at which people go through cell phones (Koreans replace on average every 11 months), it’s easy to see how the environmental side can get out of control. At least there’s gold in the garbage! Yarr.

Source

3. M-Voting in Estonia

While the 2008 US election is abuzz with web penetration, E-stonia’s been leading the global technopolitical charge. As Lithuania books a seat on the e-voting (online voting) train, Estonia’s letting mobile phones both act as a convenient vote delivery platform, but also a personal identity confirmation, ushering in a new era of what is being called “m-voting”.

Source

4. Koreans Love to Text Message. Seriously.

Korean teenagers between 15 and 19 years of age send well over 20,000 text messages a year, on average (60.1 texts per day). I don’t care how fast StarCraft has made your fingers - that’s a lot of time that could have been spent… I dunno… talking to people. According to the Korea Times in February 2006, “over 30% of South Korean students send 100 text messages a day”.

Source

5. The First Cell Phone Came Out in 1983

Well, at least, the first to get FCC acceptance. It was called the Motorola DynaTAC 8000X. Before you lolz at the cheesebag name, wait until you hear what it stands for: Dynamic Adaptive Total Area Coverage. Kinda endearing, I guess. They sound… proud.

6. Cell Phone… Or Flashlight?

Lost power? Sneaking back into bed? According to a Sprint survey, just under two-thirds of cell phone users use the backlight as a flashlight. A testament to human ingenuity! I guess it’s obvious, in a way. And here I thought I was being clever.

Source

7. You Can Get Stuffed Into a Locker Through Your Phone

Ok, not really, but apparently text message bullying is on the rise in England. As an online anti-cyber-bullying guide explains, text message bullying allows for abuse around the clock. You want to pick on some kid, he’s available 24/7. It’s like those massive Blackberry ads at airports that boast that you now never have to leave the office. Bullying has never been more efficient!

Source

8. Cell Phones Can Help Stop Nuclear Terrorism

Using solid-state radiation sensors, researchers at Purdue University are working to allow network of properly set up cell phones to track the presence of radioactive material. Since likely targets for terrorist attacks are major urban centers, and since most people have cell phones, this system could help collectively find out where the problem lies.

Source

9. Used for National Disaster Response

Mobiles are more useful during an emergency than just for calling loved ones. Other countries have adopted systems whereby phone companies automatically warn citizens of emergencies/disasters - free of charge. Finland, in 2005, adopted such a system, as did Japan.

Source

10. Half of Japan’s Top Fiction Was Written on Mobile Phones

Absolutely nuts. Turning the publishing industry on its head, this trend’s subscriber models are thriving and making significant money for aspiring writers, in turn fueling the phenomenon. Authors tend to be young women sharing fictionalized aspects of their lives. Five of the top ten works of fiction in 2007 were written on mobile phones. Japan, you never cease to amaze me.

Source

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50 TV Reporters Give You Their Best ‘O Face’

2008-06-17T09:04:00.001-07:00

via The Best Article Every day by bspcn on 6/11/08

Written by blakeley

Ever wonder what some of your favorite television news reporters look like during sex? Gawker video guys Richard Blakeley and Nick McGlynn, along with their army of interns, have collected still frames of fifty reporters, anchors, and other TV folks giving their best “O faces.” The expressions imply everything from long and luxurious moans to awkward and embarrassing early finishes. Find all 50 after the jump. The dirtier your mind, the more you’ll enjoy them.

Jon Stewart

Ines Rosales

Greg Hepkin

Andrea Day

Anderson Cooper

Charles Gibson

Bob Schieffer

Mark Steines

Katy Tur

Katie Snow

Diane Sawyer

Rick Sanchez

Patricia Del Rio

Maria Bartiromo

Emily Francis

John Muller

Cynthia Bowers

Brian Williams

Steve Salvatore

Stephen Colbert

Hazel Sanchez

Dave Carlin

Deborah Norville

Terry Moran

Sue Simmons

Charlie Rose

Juju Chang

Bill O’Reilly

Joel McHale

Kathie Lee Gifford

Arnold Diaz

Linda Church

Tracie Strahan

Chris Wragge

Kristine Johnson

Nick Gregory

Mike Woods

Shepard Smith

Sabrina Fang

Dick Brennan

Giovanna Drpic

Bertha Coombs

Mary Hart

Mary Calvi

Lisa Evers

Kelly Wallace

Dan Kloeffler

Margaret Brennan

Chris Cuomo

Katie Couric

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10 Xbox LIVE Achievement Commandments

2008-06-17T09:02:00.001-07:00

via The Best Article Every day by bspcn on 6/15/08

Written by Dick Ward

It’s time to face facts. No matter how much players may protest their hatred of achievements, there’s a small part of everyone that warms up inside when they do something really clever and are rewarded for it. The Xbox 360’s achievements is a very cool way to deliver these rewards to players that lets them share their conquests and progress with other gamers. However, the inconsistency between games is a bit astounding. Fight Night Round 3 was the easiest 1000 points I ever got, while Marvel Ultimate Alliance still holds points hostage from me, and I know there’s no way I’ll ever complete the list for Gears of War. In order to help get this all straightened out, I’ve created The Ten Commandments of Xbox 360 Achievements.

1. Thou Shalt Not Deny Player 2 Achievement Points

Spider-Man: Friend or Foe is a pretty standard beat-em-up game with some light RPG elements. It’s like Marvel Ultimate Alliance lite. The game is completely enjoyable, though the joy of beating levels is soured a bit by the fact that only the person in the first player position gets rewarded for it. So of course, in the interest of fairness, the game must be beaten twice through. This is flat out inexcusable.

2. Thou Shalt Allow the Second, Third, and Fourth Players Unlock Unique Achievements.

Gears of War had this one down. Allowing whoever played as Dominic Santiago to pick up a few bonus Achievements was a nice way to piqué some more interest. Players that had already beaten the game in single player mode were more than eager to help out friends in their playthroughs to get the achievement.

3. Thou Shalt Give Easy Mode Credit For Hard Mode Completion

Why is it that anyone should be forced to play a game on easy? Sure, some people may be new and wish to play at a simpler setting, but what of the players who complete a game the first time through on harder difficulties? If a player can beat Rock Band on hard, I’m sure they can beat it on easy and medium too. Stop making us play the watered down versions in order to get our scores up.

4. Thou Shalt Not Create Achievements Which Encourage Unnatural Play

Assassin’s Creed, I’m looking at you here. The flags are really, really annoying. So are your pigeons, GTA IV. People don’t find these naturally, they go online, find a guide, and then follow it. This isn’t helping gameplay, just creating busywork.

5. Thou Shalt Create Clever Secret Achievements

While playing through the final chapters of The Last Crusade, I, as Dr. Henry Jones, accidentally killed my friend, who was playing Indy. Much to my surprise and delight, up popped up an achievement for the act called “That’s for Blasphemy”. Recalling a classic movie line and surprising us both, this was a really cool achievement to earn. Of course, as soon as I switched to Indy, he quickly returned the favor.

6. Thou Shalt Not Create Achievements Which Ruin Online Play

As much as I praised Gears of War earlier, I must tear it down now for creating a truly awful online experience due to constant achievement farming. Were these more reasonable, or earned as medals like in Halo 3, the online competition would have been much more enjoyable.

7. Thou Shalt Offer interesting ways to earn points online that benefit the experience.

The Orange Box gets some love on this one for its Team Fortress 2 achievements. Encouraging players to try their hand at each class is nice, but offering a special medic achievement truly helps the game. In a world so often bereft of players willing to take up the medic and help their team, Valve gives them a reason to try.

8. Thou Shalt Create Achievements of Opportunity.

Those players that aren’t compulsive about their achievement points will agree: it’s cool to get something that no one else has. Being online with 1,000 in NBA Live 07 is one that will most likely never be earned again, and is a sort of mark of pride. Killing a developer in GTA IV is a great example too. Anyone with that achievement has some pretty great bragging rights.

9. Thou Shalt Not give 0 point achievements for legitimate things. (I’m looking at you Kameo! 0 points for Co-op achievements.)

Who or whatever made the makers of Kameo decide that cooperative play should garner 0 point achievements needs to be hunted down and destroyed. Achievements are really just slaps on the back with an assigned point value; the amount of points isn’t truly what’s important, but it’s nice to see. 5 or 10 point achievements are fine, but 0? That’s just a bit insulting, isn’t it? For those 0 point achievements, there’s always the Halo 3 badge route.

10. Thou Shalt Give booby prize achievements.

Two games come to mind immediately. The Simpsons Game makes great parodies of the achievement system in general with its “Press Start” achievement. Until then, I’d never laughed at an achievement before, though admittedly I did snigger at “My love for you is like a truck”. NHL 2K7 also gives out a fantastic booby prize. Players exiting a total of 10 online matches while still in progress will unlock a 0 point achievement called “Quitter”.

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UroClub makes peeing on the golf course a private affair

2008-06-07T15:59:00.001-07:00

Brilliant.

via Boing Boing Gadgets by Joel Johnson on 6/6/08

The "UroClub" looks like a 7 Iron, but is actually a device that lets you pee surreptitiously right on the fairway. Unscrew the cap, cover yourself with the attached towel, and send your urine streaming through the shaft ~~onto the ground below~~ to be emptied later. It's sort of genius, especially since the only thing that makes golf worth playing is lots of beer.

Product Page [Uroclub.com via Gizmodo]

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25 Things I Learned About Business from “South Park”

2008-06-07T15:56:00.001-07:00

Hillarious!..

via The Best Article Every day by bspcn on 6/4/08

Written by Amber Conrad

What the comedic cartoon can teach you about navigating the business world.

Over the last 12 years, the cartoon residents of South Park, Colo. have taught us about life, love, Canada, Saddam Hussein and yes … business. Here are 25 things that “South Park” has taught the world about making a buck.

Use the Internet to go viral.
In season 12’s “Canada on Strike” episode, the boys try to end the strike to get Terrance and Phillip back on the air. They decide to raise “Internet money” by posting a video on “YouToob” of Butters singing “What What in the Butt.” The video is a huge hit, and the boys are soon on their way to collecting their “Internet money.” The kids use the Internet and the resulting media coverage to get their cause out there, and by using these same resources, you too can introduce your business and its services to the world.

Money is the cure for all that ails your business.
The point of being in business is to make money. Sometimes, capitalism can also help advance the human race or make life better for everyone. In season 12’s “Tonsil Trouble,” Cartman gets HIV when he has his tonsils removed. He and Kyle go on a quest for the cure, and discover that fellow AIDS survivor Magic Johnson sleeps with stacks of money in his room. Believing that his constant proximity to cold, hard cash is the cure for AIDS., the boys learn that money really can cure everything. Maybe your business isn’t turning a profit because it needs more money.
Get a ringer for the win.
A ringer is a contestant who is entered in a competition under false pretenses — usually someone who looks like they are terrible at a sport or game they actually excel at. In the “Conjoined Fetus Lady” episode in season 2, Pip, normally picked on for his assumed French heritage and feminine ways, turns out to be the best player on South Park’s dodgeball team, helping the team earn a spot in the national championship.
It goes to show that even sensitive-looking little boys can throw a mean ball. What does it all mean for your company? Go out and hire a mild-mannered star worker and start winning.

Have a reliable work force and a stable customer base.
In the season 2 epdisode “Roger Ebert Should Lay Off the Fatty Foods,” the planetarium owner brainwashes kids to work at the learning center and also convinces the town’s people that they must go back to the center again and again. This episode teaches that it’s not important how a business secures employee and customer loyalty as log as it gets done.

Protect the local wildlife for good PR.
When the boys find the last two jackovasaurses in the “Jackovasaurs” episode from season 3, the town is visited by representatives of the Office of the Interior, who set up the pair with mating accommodations. Even though the jackovasaurses prove to be horribly annoying and largely useless to society, the episode teaches us that your business should go out of its way to appease the sensitivities of others — even if it’s inconvenient to do so.

Provide neat stuff to people who need to validate themselves through consumerism.
It’s a well-known fact that people with money want to spend it. Get them to give that expendable income to you and your business by providing them with cheap but trendy items for their collecting pleasure. It is important to stay ahead of the trends here, and that’s difficult when people still have free will. To get around this, the “Chinpokomon” episode from season 3 teaches us to market to children, who have their parents’ purse strings around their little fingers and cannot resist the latest must-haves.

If what your business sells is scarce, people will pay more for it.
In season 4’s quaintly named “Cherokee Hair Tampon” episode, Kyle finds out that he needs a kidney transplant, but the only donor is Cartman. Cartman offers his extra kidney to Kyle … for $10 million. Also in this episode, the town’s people are duped by a holistic woman who claims that her products are mystical and rare and that by buying them, the people will be able to help cure Kyle. So if your business provides items that are scarce, like a lifesaving organs or spiritual-healing trinkets, people will gladly pay large sums of money for them.

Identify the competition.
In “Helen Keller! The Musical” episode from season 4, the kids learn the importance of competition. The South Park kids are in fourth grade now and are putting on a play. They find out from Butters that the kindergartners have a better production, so they work hard to trick out their show to make it better. They even hire a specialist, a thespian from sophisticated Denver, who turns the whole production into a “Les Misérables” spoof. Their production is grand, and they beat the kindergartners. And even though it turns out not to matter, the kids still learn to work hard to beat out the competition … and to teach a mentally challenged turkey to jump through a fiery hoop.

Create a buzz.
Everyone in South Park tunes in to watch a television show that allegedly says a curse word during prime time. When the show gets press coverage, Kyle calls it for what it is — a marketing ploy designed to boost ratings. This season 5 episode, “It Hits The Fan,” teaches us that people will endure things that they do not normally enjoy just so that they can say they saw or did something controversial.

Investors can help your startup dreams come true.
Cartman’s grandmother leaves him $1 million dollars, which he promptly uses to buy his own amusement park in the “Cartmanland” episode from season five. At first, Cartman is convinced that his money has bought him happiness, but he soon sees that it isn’t the only thing that he needs to emotionally survive. That warm, fuzzy sentiment aside, Cartman shows us that with a big chunk of someone else’s money, you can buy property for your business and hire people to help run it.

Never underestimate the little guys.
In “The Entity” episode from season 5, Mr. Garrison gets tired of airline check-in lines and invents his own vehicle that is so amazing it soon becomes the preferred mode of travel for certain demographics. The airline companies start to go under, but the government steps in to save them. This episode also teaches another important lesson for those who are venturing into the business world: Sometimes, you can turn to the government for help and undeserved cash.

Sponsorships and partnerships mean that people are giving you money.
The boys discover that Jared from the Subway commercials has assistants — including a personal trainer and a dietitian — that helped him lose the weight. This prompts the boys to try to dupe the American public by doing the same thing with a local Chinese-food restaurant. In the episode “Jared Has Aides” from season 6, the boys make Butters gain weight so that they can get the restaurant to sponsor his weight loss by eating only their food. Basically, the lesson here is that sometimes you have to do uncomfortable things like stuff yourself with food then starve yourself to get money. But it’s still money.

It is important to honor your contractual agreements.
A very not “Lord of the Rings” movie gets delivered to Butters, and the boys are enlisted to get it back. The South Park characters all act out characters in this episode from season 6, titled “The Return of the Fellowship of the Rings to the Two Towers.” Stan’s parents told the kids to bring back the movie, and being of noble mind frames, the boys embark on their quest to return it. This episode teaches the value of honoring agreements and going above and beyond to fulfill obligations in business partnerships.

Take risks.
When the local Native American casino tries to buy the town of South Park in “Red Man’s Greed” from season 7, the kids come up with a plot to take their parents’ money and have them gamble it away to come up with the extra funding. The kids take their parents’ savings and bet on a long shot — just like you should sometimes do in business. Remember: to win big, you have to play big.

Edge out the competition to get what you want.
It’s Kyle’s birthday in “Casa Bonita” from season 7, and everyone is going to an awesome restaurant to celebrate. The problem is that Cartman isn’t invited. He takes issue with Kyle inviting Butters instead of him and decides to trick Butters into thinking that a meteor has hit Earth. He then gets Butters shipped off to the city dump, which Butters thinks is the post-destruction reality of the world. Meanwhile, Cartman goes to the restaurant while Butters freaks out among the trash.

Research is the key to knowing your customers.
In “AWESOM-O” from season 8, Cartman decides that he will dress up as a robot to learn Butters’ secrets so he can better make fun of him at school. He asks Butters to tell him his deepest darkest secrets, and Butters complies. By going undercover, Cartman learns more about his bullying target and can adjust his cruelty accordingly.

Learn PR-management skills.
South Park ’s mascot, the cow, has been called into question by a local PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) grou, in one episode from season 8. This prompts the school to change its mascot. Special-interest groups like PETA can sometimes challenge the ways in which a company does business. A lot. For instance, a special-interest could shut your company down because it feel like your business is doing something wrong — like misspelling a word in your sign or killing babies. But if your company properly manages these groups’ issues, it can come off looking like a community supporter without incurring a lot of business damage. The trick is to appeal to the middle ground, as the town does when it decides to take the mascot-change decision to a city vote, which makes the decision a public one without laying blame on the school district.

It is good to embrace change.
Sometimes in business, you have to shake up long-standing practices to make way for the new. In an episode from season 9, Mr. Garrison gets a sex change and feels like a new woman. Meanwhile, Kyle gets a race change so that he can play basketball. Both characters get what they want until the end of the episode, but the point is that by changing things up in their lives, they were able to step into a new persona (or in your business’s case, a new market).

Recognize a good business opportunity.
Hippies have infested South Park in “Die Hippie Die” from season 9, and Cartman sees this as an opportunity to help exterminate them for the good of the citizens — and a profit. You can relate Cartman’s business sense to your livelihood, except not literally, because spraying hippies with insecticide is kind of illegal.

Stand up and fight for good employees who are going through hard times.
It is important in the business world to have strong professional relationships with your employees. It is also important to remember that your employees are people too and that you should sometimes cut them some slack — especially when they decide to go on a sabbatical like Chef does in season 10. But in the time it takes to have a fake flashback, he’s returned to South Park in the episode “The Return of Chef.” However, Chef starts saying really odd things, and the boys find out that he’s been brainwashed. Instead of giving up on him, they get to the bottom of his troubles and eventually cure him. The boys didn’t give up on their favorite school employee, just like you shouldn’t give up on one of your hardworking team members.

Sometimes you need outside experts to get things working properly.
In season 10’s “Tsst,” (also known as “the dog-whisperer” episode), Cartman gets so out of hand that his mom hires a special nanny, who fails to correct his behavior. So Ms. Cartman hires another nanny, who also fails and ends up in a mental institution. Success occurs when Cartman’s mom brings in the dog whisperer, who treats Cartman so terribly that he runs away. So if you don’t know how to deal with a business obstacle, it might be time to call in an expert.

Fight hostile takeovers to the bitter end if you want to keep your company intact.
Mrs. Garrison’s favorite bar is being threatened to be shut down by a Persian group who wants to turn it into a dance club in “D-Yikes!” from season 11. The bar patrons appeal to the mayor and also look to blackmail as a means to their ends. The customers fight to keep their group together, just like you should fight to keep your company intact when faced with dance-club owners or corporate pirates — whichever comes first.

The government can help you stick it to your competitors.
During the “Imaginationland” episodes in season 11, Cartman goes all the way to the U.S. Supreme Court to settle a bet between him and Kyle. By using the legal system to settle their differences, the boys avoid unprofessional behavior, which teaches us all to opt for costly lawyers — not hit men — to resolve issues.

Get big names in on your venture to attract starstruck customers.
Season 1 also gave us “Damien,” in which the son of Satan comes back as a fourth grader, causing Jesus and Satan to duke it out in the ultimate pay-per-view event. Lots of money comes in when people want to see the stars of good and evil go at it on live TV for only $49.95. After all, no one can miss the “final apocalyptic battle between good and evil.” What would they talk about the next week at the watercooler?

Impress your audience.
In season 1’s “Weight Gain 4000,” Kathie Lee Gifford comes to town to give Cartman an award for writing an environmental essay. Mr. Garrison has a flashback about how Kathie Lee ruined his life by winning over the judges at an elementary-school talent show. After Mr. Garrison’s little grade-school self looses to Kathie Lee, he sulks “It wasn’t fair; she had choreography.”

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14 Creative Advertisements Part 2

2008-06-07T15:55:00.001-07:00

Amazing!.

via The Best Article Every day by bspcn on 6/6/08

Written by Toxel

After the success of our 14 Creative Advertisements post, we decided to post another collection of creative advertising ideas. Enjoy.

Formula Toothcare Advertisement

“builds strong teeth” [link]

iPod nano Advertisement

FedEx Advertisement

Amusing FedEx ad that features UPS inside the Fedex truck. The words on the UPS truck are German. Competitive advertisement at its best. [link]

Ironing Service Advertisement

Advertising Agency: BJL, Manchester, UK [link]

Mr. Clean Advertisement

Eskom Electricity Advertisement

BMW Advertisement

Jobsintown Advertisement

Creative advertisements for Jobsintown.de [more here]

Whiskas Origami Advertisement

Advertising Agency: TBWA London, UK [link]

Star Wars Movie Advertisement

Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith

Calcutta School of Music Advertisement

Rotkäppchen “Pacman” Advertisement

Advertising Agency: Cayenne, Germany [link]

Hush Puppies Advertisement

Casual footwear for the entire family.

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The 50 Best Pun Stores

2008-06-07T15:54:00.001-07:00

This is so cool.

via The Best Article Every day by bspcn on 6/7/08

Written by Michelle Collins

Pun stores. Stores with puns in the title. Bet you didn’t think we could rank the 50 best ones. But you didn’t even think there were 50. Well guess again. BWE.tv has scoured the internet and pulled together the 50 Best Pun Establishments. And here we go:

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46 More Pun Stores (Seriously) After the cut.

And they’re pretty much all brilliant.

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Comments time! Let us know your favorite pun store titles below.

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30 Upcoming Movie Sequels You Didn’t Know About

2008-06-03T09:06:00.001-07:00

Most of them are interesting.

via The Best Article Every day by bspcn on 6/1/08

Written by Simon Brew

I Am Legend 2: now entering development hell..

We’ve spent days of our lives scouring the world for news of sequels that you may not have heard of. And here are 30 films in various states of production…

The domination of sequels in the big summer and winter schedules continues, and if the following - in particular order - is anything to go by, it’s going to carry on for many years to come…

The Brazilian Job: the follow up to Paramount’s US remake of The Italian Job is still on the cards, and it’s got a 2009 release date marked. Jason Statham, Mos Def, Mark Wahlberg and Charlize Theron are attached, as is director F Gary Gray.

I, Robot 2: All we know on this one is that it’s in the scripting stages still, with a potential 2010 release date planned in. No news on Mr Smith’s involvement.

I Am Legend 2: Warner’s huge Christmas 2007 hit could also have a follow up, although it’d be interesting to see if Will Smith returned to it. A 2010 release date is also being mooted for this one. Director Matt Reeves said that a sequel could follow the same disaster scenario from the point of view of other moviemakers in New York that night.

Beverly Hills Cop 4: If Die Hard can still do it at the box office, why can’t Axel Foley? Er, because the third BHC movie was crap, and a flop. Still, it’s not stopped development work going ahead on number four. No further news than that, though.

National Treasure 3: Not a huge surprise, but as the Nic Cage Indiana Jones knock off franchise has proved to be quite a juggernaut, you’ll only have to wait until 2011 for the third film in the series.

Cars 2: We spotted this on AintItCool - is Pixar really looking to make a sequel to its weakest film? Apparently so…

Toy Story 3: This one, after lots of umming and ahhing, appears to be a goer. It won’t, as was speculated, be a straight-to-DVD affair, and Tom Hanks and Tim Allen are both expected back on voicing duties. It’ll be out in 2010.

Jeepers Creepers 3: MGM is running the rule over a potential third instalment in the horror franchise, with director Victor Salva still attached. Hmmm.

Shrek 5: The fourth film was a no-brainer after the tepid third outing made so much cash. But a fifth instalment has also been confirmed. No wonder Shrek is the same colour as an American dollar…

Night at the Museum 2: Ben Stiller is returning for his most commercially successful role outside of the Meet the Parents franchise. We can wait. No news on the proposed Meet The Little Focker, though.

Crank 2: High Voltage: This is more like it. Crank is a guilty pleasure right up there with Snakes on a Plane, and it’s coming back for more. Shooting starts next month, for a 2009 release, and Jason Statham returns as Chev Chelios. As he should.

Transporter 3: Statham again. He’s making this too, and it’s in pre-production. Presumably, he’ll go from Crank 2 straight onto this.

Super Troopers 2: A sequel nobody asked for! Hurray! Expect it in 2010, as it’s in the early writing stages still, we believe.

Silent Hill 2: Sony is looking at a follow up to the crap-but-popular video game adaptation. 2010 is the current slated release date.

The Descent 2: We understand that Neil Marshall won’t be directed this one, which has the, er, working title of The De2cent. He’s attached as Executive Producer, with Jon Harris stepping behind the camera (he edited the first film, as well as the more recent Stardust).

The Grudge 3: Yup, it’s in pre-production now, for release next year. That’ll likely be the scariest thing about it.

Ice Age 3: 1st July 2009. That’s the date you’ll need to avoid if you want to miss the next Ice Age movie. Hopefully it’ll be better than the second one…

Ghost Rider 2: A surprise hit last year, Marvel is developing a follow-up to the Nic Cage comic book flick, and tentatively has 2009 marked for release. No director is thus far attached.

The Untouchables: Capone Rising: A prequel to Brian De Palma’s cracking prohibition thriller of, er, twenty years ago. De Palma is back behind the camera, and the project is in the pre-production stages now.

The Thomas Crown Affair 2: Weird, this. It’s taken them ages to do a sequel, and then they draft in Paul Verhoeven to direct a follow-up to someone else’s film. Pierce Brosnan returns, and filming starts shortly.

The People Under The Stairs 2: No sign of any Wes Craven involvement, though, and release may even be this year. Hmmm. We’d wager DVD will be its home.

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor: Er, that’s what they’ve called The Mummy 3, which is out on 1st August. Brendan Fraser and Jet Li star.

Punisher: War Zone: Ray Stevenson becomes the third person to play The Punisher on screen. You’ll be able to find out how he did on 12th September this year.

Starship Troopers 3: Marauder: Casper Van Diem is back, but it’s still going straight to DVD, as the piss-awful second film did. It’s due out later this year.

Pink Panther 2: Oh dear. And I’m a Steve Martin fan. It’s out on 13th February 2009.

Ace Ventura 3: No Jim Carrey though, and no chance of it seeing the inside of a cinema. Head to Blockbuster later in the year if you want to catch it.

War of the Worlds 2: The Next Wave: Another straight to DVD sequel, but this one’s of note because it’s directed by Soul Man/Hitcher star C Thomas Howell. Blimey.

Jurassic Park 4: It’s taken them ages to sort this out, but the latest is that Laura Dern is still attached, and that it’ll be released in 2009. Don’t hold your breath though, as shooting would need to start really very soon…

Scary Movie 5/Saw 5: You could have guessed at these if you didn’t know about them already. Both should see the light before the end of the year. Sadly.

Put your thoughts in the Comments box, and let us know if you want more lists of this ilk in the future…!

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How I Sold My iPhone in 24 Hours For More Than I Paid [IPhone]

2008-06-03T09:03:00.001-07:00

Brilliant

via Gizmodo by Christopher Mascari on 6/3/08

With the possible announcement of the 3G iPhone only a week away, many current iPhone owners are itching to upgrade, which takes money. Other people, finally bitten by the iPhone bug, are eager to buy one, only they are harder to find in stores. This creates a nice, natural supply-and-demand formula that we managed to exploit not once but twice on eBay. Not only did I sell my iPhone in 24 hours, but I sold it for more than I paid.

A week ago, Benny and I both made the decision to sell our 8GB iPhones. Even though the iPhone is now a year old, there is still huge demand for it. On a weekly basis, lines form inside and even outside Apple stores, specifically for the iPhone. This dwindling stock of iPhones on the web and in stores makes it a perfect item to sell on eBay, new or used.

Having sold items before on eBay, I knew to check how many iPhones were currently for sale. My search brought back 1,800 auctions. At first I thought, no way would I fetch decent money for my six-month-old phone. But after studying the eBay iPhone market, I noticed something strange. Of the 1,800 iPhones on eBay, a whopping 1,200 are unlocked. And of those 1,200 unlocked, 800 are basically brand new. These new unlocked iPhones will easily reach over $500 for 8GB models and $600 for 16GB models.

But current iPhone owners have, by definition, used iPhones. Turns out, that's OK. In my research, used 8GB iPhone auctions usually ended around $350, which is good money. But by following a few strategies, a used iPhone can easily sell for more than that.

What to Include
Since most of the auctions are for new iPhones, it's best to have the original box and accessories, This will allow the auction to compete with the new ones, and buyers pay much more for a complete set.

Unlocked = $$$
Even if it might be unauthorized, having an unlocked iPhone will bring much more attention. Used unlocked iPhone auctions usually end above $400 for 8GB models and above $500 for 16GB models. And these figures are on the low end of the results, and it's not uncommon for 8GB iphones to sell above $500, like these two, here and here, that sold for $560. So by simply selling a Pwned and unlocked iPhone, a much higher selling price can be expected.

Listing Duration
A week ago when I sold my iPhone, I had originally listed it with a 7-day auction. This was a mistake. 24-hours after my listing was posted, not a single person had looked at it. With over 33 pages of iPhones on eBay, it made sense that no one was going to search all the way to page 33 to see new listings.

So the shorter the listing time the better, and the 1-day listing option was the best. Not only did it put the auction on the 9th page of the search, as opposed to the 33rd, it also provided instant gratification, since it only took 24 hours for the iPhone to sell.

Starting Price/No Reserve
Even if the listing has only 1 day, starting it off at a low amount is smart. By having an auction that starts at $1 with a no-reserve price, it attracts more watchers, and usually brings a higher selling price. Yes, having no reserve could mean that your precious auction item sells for 3 bucks, but it hasn't happened to any of the 8,000 completed iPhone sales on eBay, so why would it happen to yours?

Shipping
It's also smart to say you'll ship worldwide, especially for unlocked iPhones. Most of the unlocked iPhones that advertise worldwide shipping not only attracted more watchers and brought more money but, surprisingly or not, they also usually ended up selling within the US.

Title & Keywords
The most important part of selling an iPhone on eBay is the title, since it basically attracts the buyer. A good title it will bring more watchers, and using popular keywords is the way to go. Stuff like "No Reserve," "NR," "Unlocked," "Jailbroken," "Any GSM SIM," "Original Box" and "Accessories" are just a few. If the auction ships worldwide, then make sure the title advertises this. In this auction, simply stating "Ship Worldwide" brought in $610 for a used 8GB. The more keywords the better, so it's best to add a subtitle for an extra 50 cents. This allows for a whole extra line which will fit much more of the important keywords. Here's a solid, winning title and subtite:

UNLOCKED Apple iPhone 8GB Jailbroken Any GSM SIM
Original Box and Accessories SHIPS WORLDWIDE

By using these techniques I was able to sell my used iPhone for $425 ($410 after fees), and it has made me even more excited for Steve Jobs' keynote on June 9th. Bathtub-lovin' Benny did a little worse, or a little better depending on how you look at it: He didn't advertise worldwide shipping, he had an aftermarket charger instead of the original one and his iPhone had a big scratch on it, and he still cleared $380. After expenses!

For current iPhone owners who have been contemplating selling in anticipation for the new iPhone, you might want to act quickly while it's still a seller's market. Then again, the market may already be flooded.

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30 Beautiful And Original Product Designs

2008-06-03T09:02:00.001-07:00

Oh love it.

via The Best Article Every day by bspcn on 5/27/08

Written by Smashing Magazine

Successful product design manages to reveal useful functionality beyond its appealing form. No matter how excellent a design looks like, most customers aren’t likely to spend money on something they won’t be able to use. On the other hand, most people are likely to buy something useful despite the design it has.

Yet the key to a truly successful product design lies in designer’s ability to combine both beautiful design and functionality making it obvious to the customers how the product can be used and which benefits it delivers. However, one can combine the beauty of design with the utility it is supposed to provide.

Most products fail to pass this test and never reach the production stage; some products do manage to get to the stores. In the overview below you’ll find an overview of some beautiful and original product designs which will hopefully make the cut and will be available in the next years. Some of them are already available today.

Way Out Fridge Magnet

Way Out Fridge Magnet
Way Out magnet is an original imitation of the standard exit sign illustrating a run to the fridge for a midnight snack. We, however, are not sure why this sign should actually be placed on the fridge.

Bracelet Watch

Bracelet Watch
The idea for this watch is classic plastic bracelet, with incorporated lines inside the watch that show the current time. Those three lines are rotating around the watch and show the time, while the seconds line is going around all the time. It is a simple concept, atractive and eye-catching. Adjusting the clock is easy as the watch is the touchscreen. All you have to do is to touche the line, click the adjust icon and slide current time line to correct time. Design by Djordje Zivanovic.

Made in China

Made in China
This product targets the entire 1.3 billion Chinese population. Each aspect of the hardware derives from an oriental inspiration which improves the PC experience for the targeted market. The hardware features a “No CPU, No Hard drive, No Graphics Card and No Sound Card” concept. These PC components are stored in a Service Provider of the new infrastructure.

Thus, subscribing to a plan of the Service Provider will allow the use of these components. The data from the components is then wirelessly transmitted to the user’s hardware. Thus, all PCs are administered by the Service Provider. MADE stands for Massively Administered Digital Entities.

MARRO computer system

MARRO computer system
This computer system analyzes, organizes, and customizes daily media activities. It is comprised of a stationary central unit and a separate mobile satellite unit. The central unit contains components such as the media card, CPU, drives and network card. The satellite unit houses the built-in Life OS, CPU, and flash memory.

Compared to the typical OS, which are limited to the resources and hardware of their physical location, the Life OS operates digital files and electronic devices that we use day to day. The MARRO ring records users’ daily media activities within the life system, constantly learning life patterns and making suggested improvements.

External Touch Screen Concept

External Touch Screen Concept
Wouldn’t it be nice if you had an external touch screen that works as a keyboard, macbook cover and a photo/movie stand?

DDM PC

DDM PC
This concept is supposed to be “integrated device for all” that is easy to use. The “DDM” is normally used as a typical LCD display for a powerful desktop CPU yet can be detached from the main body. In this detached form, the DDM acts much like the desktop PC yet supports portability. In this way, multiple DDM’s can be taken away from the main CPU and used separately. When placed back in the CPU cradle, each unit automatically syncs the its data with the local machine’s database offering one-step, seemless back-up and sharability.

Concrete Art

Concrete Art
“Concrete Art” is a beautiful way to enhance any room with pretty much any design you can think of. Contrasting the cold austerity of concrete, these floral designs are a great way to enhance any room. This design concept allows for the application of any pattern to the surface, either when pouring or afterwards when the concrete has set.

Action Method

Action Method
The “Action Runner” includes standard 3? x 5? sheet (when ripped), and keeps you focused on Action Steps with the elegance of the silky and sexy covers and blended paper. This ultra matt finish is spiced up with an ultra glossy UV varnish.

Slice Computing System

Slice Computing System
The ‘Slice’ concept is an organically inspired computing system which envisions a new approach to accessing, organizing and interacting with information and data stored on the PC. Current file management systems force users to store and manage files in a hierarchy of folders. The files are buried deep within folders providing no visual indication of where files are located, further adding to the confusion.

Slice brings the information out of the computer putting it into the users hand. By physically interacting with the slice, users can organize and place files accordingly. Each of the slices visually represent different folders seen in current operating software such as My Documents, My Music, My Videos, etc. The visual and touch based experience associated with slice provides the user with a tangible connection to their information stored on the computer reassuring the safety and placement of their files.

Concept Cell Phone

Concept Cell Phone
In times wenn all-rounder-phones dominate the market, more subtle, intuitive and minimalistic designs provide a sound alternative. This is just a cell phone to provide communication. No mp3, no video or camera etc. Designed by Tamer Koseli.

Rocking Chair

Rocking Wheel Chair
A concept and a modern interpretation of a rocking chair. The near circular form seen from the side is what makes the design unique. It allows for the rocking motion without being an attachment, but instead flowing into the rest of the chair. The upper part features a light source, which can be used as a reading light.

Airtrav

Airtrav
Airtrav is an electronic boarding pass concept. The touch screen interface allows for users to access airport information. Travelers can know anything and everything about their flight, dual headphones are available for multiple users and the deaf or hearing impaired can stay alert to important changes. The system has a stackable charging system (charged by an alternative power source).

Peanut Butter

Peanut Butter Jar
This is a design we’ve all been waiting for a loooong time now. The Easy PB&J Jar is a jar with two lids that allows you to access all of your peanut butter easily without having to resort to breaking open the jar. As you near the end on one side, simply flip the jar over to get the rest. The straight and smooth internal walls also ensure that no peanut butter is ever left behind a nook or cranny like existing jars.

Carry On Luggage

Carry On Luggage
A carry-on luggage to articulate the lost romance of air travel. The design also pulls from the golden age of ocean liners: the black lacquered finish will become beautifully scraped and chipped as the suitcase travels with you, revealing the bamboo plywood beneath. The patina will develop with each trip you take. Designed by Joey Roth.

Nokia 888

Nokia 888
In Nokia 888 form follows you: it is a light personal mobile communication device. You can change its form according to your needs during the day. You dont have to carry it in your pocket or on your wrist. You can carry it anywhere, in any form. You can roll it, bend it, put on your clothes like a clip.

It also makes some form changes that makes it more ergonomical: i.e. when you want to talk on the phone, the body form turns into the form of the good old telephone. You can personalize these forms and record them. Communication takes place via electronical motions that 888 has. E.g. you can send a heart shape to your girlfriend, so her telephone turns into an icon of heart.

Zeed+

Zeed+
Zeed+ is a computer which maximizes the mobility of its hardware components. All the hardware, such as the video card, sound card, CPU and network card are no longer located inside the box. Instead, each of the stem-shaped devices are well packaged standard units that sit on the vase base.

Zeed+ has the meaning of when you need something, you seed something. Each stem, or “zeed”, can be easily upgraded or changed, since they are located outside of the vase base. This also offers the benefit of trading or recylcing old “zeeds” to different market segments. Under the “zeed++” project, the older, but still usable zeeds, can be collected and reused in other Zeed+ computers for special groups, charities, education.

The overall design concept of the form is inspired by “Ikebana”, the Japanese traditional art of formal flower arrangement with special regard shown to balance, harmony, and form.

Virtual Ideas Watch

Virtual Ideas Watch
Slick, compact, beautiful and elegant watch design by Julien Soret.

Bello Concept PMP

Bello Concept PMP
Ryan Han has developed a concept with an interesting conceptual feature. The standard finger clicks, swipes and flicks are all incorporated, but the most interesting features involve utilizing shaking and pouring motions.

Printer Table

Printer Table
For those of us cursed with limited space, this is the answer. It’s a combination printer and table that blends in well with small offices as furniture. The faux drawers are actually paper loading trays and the slit is where your prints come out. Now nobody will scold you for setting your drink on top of the printer. Designer: Lukas Koh.

Onyx Concept

Onyx Concept
A next-generation phone concept, Onyx. Enabled through Synaptics clear, capacitive sensing technology, Onyx illustrates the future of mobile communications by combining an intelligent and adaptive user interface with sleek industrial design and next-generation user interaction design. The Onyx concept does not base its experience on treating applications as separate windows or entities that work in isolation. Rather, the Onyx concept seamlessly integrates functions into activity based experiences.

Aquarium Sink

Moody Aquarium Sink
Moody is not only a simple washbasin, but also an aquarium for goldfish, a Zen garden or a simple pebble river bed or whatever you would like it to be. It is completely watertight with a sand bed for fish, and provides the necessary lighting for maintaining your fish in healthy conditions. Price: $4,700.00.

Pixel Perfect Hour Glass

Pixel Perfect Hour Glass
Designer Pavel Balykin believes that retro timepiece is on schedule for a comeback. It’s fittingly called the Sand+Time Watch and has the distinct feature of a digital hour glass screen saver mode. It’s a “screen saver” mode, because this particular feature does not actually count time for you.

If you want to know the real time, click a button and a more modern interpretation of time, we like to call “numbers”, will appear. Add a motion sensor, like the one used in Apple’s iPhone, and this screen saver mode might get that extra little cool factor to push it into production.

Swiss Desk Station Model

Swiss Desk Station Model
Reconditioned phone based on a vintage Bundespost design. It is a beautiful and original product design. Which is why it is in this overview. Price: £ 215.00.

Circle Sofa

Circle Sofa
The Circle sofa unit is made up of four parts, two of which make up a semicircle; all of which together create a round sculpture. The outline and contour looks highly sculptural and vigorous - and it is left open how one arranges these sofas in a room. Due to the “segmentation” of the circle, the sofas facilitate a great diversity of options and multifunctional solutions as well as interesting sculptural forms and lines. Designed by UN Studio, Amsterdam (Ben van Berkel).

The Bulbdial Clock

The Bulbdial Clock
The Bulbdial Clock has no hands - just one pole in the center of the clock, and three light sources of varying heights which revolve around the pole casting shadows. In the model illustrated above, the light sources are each attached to a ring which rotates around the pole. The innermost ring rotates once per minute, casting a “second hand” shadow. The middle ring rotates once per hour, and casts the “minute hand” shadow. And the outer ring rotates once every 12 hours, casting the “little hand” shadow.

Keyboard Shortcut Skins

Keyboard Skins
Models available for notebook computers and desktop keyboards. Molded exactly to fit your keyboard like a glove. Quick to remove and reapply as often as you wish.

Barbouille Blackboard

Barbouille Blackboard
The Barbapapa transform themselves at will since 30 years. Marie Leblon, very inspired by their universe imagined and created all a series of objects, such these blackboard. Isn’t it just perfect for brainstorming sessions? Price: £19.86.

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14 Creative Advertisements

2008-06-03T09:01:00.001-07:00

Humm...!!

via The Best Article Every day by bspcn on 5/28/08

Written by Toxel

Check out these creative and unique advertisements from around the world:

3M Security Glass Advertisement

3M was so sure their Security Glass was unbreakable, they put a large stack of cash behind it and shoved it in a bus stop. [gizmodo]

Radiant Gym “Running” Advertisement

Obesity finds it hardest to catch up with those who are running. [lemonflip]

YKM Bag Advertisement

Where’s your child?

Canon Bus Advertisement

Premiere “Spiderman” Advertisement

Your TV program takes a break when you do.
Personal digital TV with delayed viewing. [adsoftheworld]

Creative Adidas Advertisement

Funeral Services Advertisement

Stop’n Grow Bag Advertisement

German product that stops nail biting. [flickr]

Denver Water Advertisement

Use Only What You Need.

Sharpie Permanent Markers Advertisement

Samsung “Express Yourself” Advertisement

“Reserved for Drunk Drivers” Advertisement

Dettol Instant Hand Sanitizer Advertisement

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150 Funniest Resume Mistakes, Bloopers and Blunders Ever

2008-06-03T08:57:00.001-07:00

This is a good one

via The Best Article Every day by bspcn on 6/2/08

Written by Jacob Share

People write the strangest things on their resumes, sometimes downright hysterical. Why should only recruiting managers get to laugh at these? The Top 10 are at the bottom. Enjoy!

From Resume Hell:

“Career break in 1999 to renovate my horse”
“1990 - 1997: Stewardess - Royal Air Force”
Hobbies: “enjoy cooking Chinese and Italians”
“Service for old man to check they are still alive or not.”
Cleaning skills: “bleaching, pot washing, window cleaning, mopping, e.t.c”
“Job involved…counselling clientele on accidental insurance policies available”
“2001 summer Voluntary work for taking care of the elderly and vegetable people”
“I’m intrested to here more about that. I’m working today in a furniture factory as a drawer”
“I am about to enrol on a Business and Finance Degree with the Open University. I feel that this qualification will prove detrimental to me for future success.”
“Time is very valuable and it should be always used to achieve optimum results and I believe it should not be played around with”
“I belive that weakness is the first level of strength, given the right attitude and driving force. My school advised me to fix my punctuality…”

From Careerbuilder.ca’s 10 Wackiest Resume Blunders:

Candidate included a letter from his mother.
Candidate stated the ability to persuade people sexually using her words.
Candidate wrote résumé as a play - Act 1, Act 2, etc.
Candidate included naked picture of himself.

From Amy Joyce on Resume Bloopers:

“Skills: Strong Work Ethic, Attention to Detail, Team Player, Self Motivated, Attention to Detail”
Woman who sent her résumé and cover letter without deleting someone else’s editing, including such comments as “I don’t think you want to say this about yourself here”

From Ask Annie’s article about resume blunders:

“an applicant ghosted a headshot as the background to her resume”
Other Interests: “Playing with my two dogs (They actually belong to my wife but I love the dogs more than my wife)”.
“One applicant used colored paper and drew glitter designs around the border”
Hobbies: “getting drunk everynight down by the water, playing my guitar and smoking pot”
Why Interested in Position: “to keep my parole officer from putting back me in jail”
A woman had attached a picture of herself in a mini mouse costume
Hobbies: “Drugs and girls”.
Under “job related skills” - for a web designer - “can function without additional oxygen at 24,000 feet”.
My sister-in-law misspelled the word “proofreading” in her skill set.
The objective on one recent resume I received stated that the applicant wished to pursue a challenging account executive position with our rival firm.
Objective: “career on the Information Supper Highway”
Experience: “Stalking, shipping & receiving”
“I am great with the pubic.”
A candidate listed her e-mail address as pornstardelight@*****.com
The applicant listed her name as Alice in the resume but wrote Alyce on the onsite application.
One candidate’s electronic resume included links to her homepage, where the pictures were of her in the nude.
“…sent out my resume on the back side of a draft of a cover letter to another firm…”
“My duties included cleaning the restrooms and seating the customers.”
One applicant for a nursing position noted that she didn’t like dealing with blood or needles.
Achievements: “Nominated for prom queen”
I once received a resume with a head and shoulders picture in the top left of the first page. The picture was of a lion’s head, wearing a coat, shirt, and tie.
a resume… was printed on the back of the person’s current employer’s letterhead.
One resume that came across my desk stated how the individual had won a contest for building toothpick bridges in middle school.
A resume… had several grease stains and a smudge of chocolate on it
Hobbies: “Having a good time”

From Careerbuilder.com’s Top 12 Wackiest Resume Blunders:

Candidate explained a gap in employment by saying it was because he was getting over the death of his cat for three months.
Candidate’s hobbies included sitting on the levee at night watching alligators.
Candidate explained an arrest by stating, “We stole a pig, but it was a really small pig.”
Candidate included family medical history.

From Mainejobs.com’s Avoid These Resume Bloopers:

“nine-page cover letter accompanied by a four-page résumé”
“One applicant tried to make an impression by using four different fonts, three ink colors and a variety of highlighting options on her résumé”

From ResumePower.com’s Ten Classic Resume Bloopers:

“Revolved customer problems and inquiries.”
“Consistently tanked as top sales producer for new accounts.”
“Planned new corporate facility at $3 million over budget.”
“Seeking a party-time position with potential for advancement.”

From HotJobs’ Real-life Resume Blunders to Avoid:

“I often use a laptap.”
“Able to say the ABCs backward in under five seconds.”
“I am a wedge with a sponge taped to it. My purpose is to wedge myself into someone’s door to absorb as much as possible.”

From Fortune Magazine via HumorMatters.com:

“Finished eighth in my class of ten.”
“Received a plague for Salesperson of the Year.”
“Reason for leaving last job: maturity leave.”
“Failed bar exam with relatively high grades.”
“Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details.”
“It’s best for employers that I not work with people.”
“Let’s meet, so you can ‘ooh’ and ‘aah’ over my experience.”
“I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse.”
“You will want me to be Head Honcho in no time.”
“I have become completely paranoid, trusting completely no one and absolutely nothing.”
“Personal interests: donating blood. Fourteen gallons so far.”
“Marital status: often. Children: various.”
“I am loyal to my employer at all costs..Please feel free to respond to my resume on my office voice mail.”
“Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chain store.”

From Resumania’s Archive:

Job Duties: “Answer phones, file papers, respond to customer e-mails, take odors.”
Interests: “Gossiping.”
Favorite Activities: “Playing trivia games. I am a repository of worthless knowledge.”
Skills: “I can type without looking at thekeyboard.”
Employer: ” Myself; received pay raise for high sales.”
Objective: “I want to play a major part in watching a company advance.”
Experience: “Chapter president, 1887-1992.”
Experience: “Demonstrated ability in multi-tasting.”
Experience: “I’m a hard worker, etc.”
Languages: “Speak English and Spinach.”
Reason for leaving: “I thought the world was coming to an end.”
Additional skills: “I am a Notary Republic.”
Objective: “So one of the main things for me is, as the movie ‘Jerry McGuire’ puts it, ‘Show me the money!’”
Skills: “I have integrity so I will not steal office supplies and take them home.”
Objective: “To hopefully associate with a millionaire one day.”
Skills: “I have technical skills that will take your breath away.”
Qualifications: “I have guts, drive, ambition and heart, which is probably more than a lot of the drones that you have working for you.”
Objective: “I need money because I have bills to pay and I would like to have a life, go out partying, please my young wife with gifts, and have a menu entrée consisting of more than soup.”
Qualifications: “Twin sister has accounting degree.”
Experience: “Have not yet been abducted by aliens.”
Skills: “Written communication = 3 years; verbal communication = 5 years.”
Objective: “I would like to work for a company that is very lax when it comes to tardiness.”
Education: “I possess a moderate educatin but willing to learn more.”
Education: “Have repeated courses repeatedly.”
Salary requirements: “The higher the better.”
Salary desired: “Starting over due to recent bankruptcies. Need large bonus when starting job.”
Bad traits: “I am very bad about time and don’t mind admitting it. Having to arrive at a certain hour doesn’t make sense to me. What does make sense is that I do the job. Any company that insists upon rigid time schedules will find me a nightmare.”
References: “Bill, Tom, Eric. But I don’t know their phone numbers.”
Work experience: “Two years as a blackjack and baccarat dealer. Strong emphasis on customer relations - a constant challenge considering how much money people lose and how angry they can get.”
Personal: “I limit important relationships to people who want to do what I want them to do.”
Objective: “Student today. Vice president tomarrow.”
Accomplishments: “Brought in a balloon artist to entertain the team.”
Application: Why should an employer hire you? “I bring doughnuts on Friday.”
Achievements: “First runner-up for Miss Fort Worth, 1982.”
Reason for leaving: “Pushed aside so the vice president’s girlfriend could steal my job.”
Special skills: “I’ve got a Ph.D. in human feelings.”
Reason for leaving last job: “Bounty hunting was outlawed in my state.”
Experience: “Any interruption in employment is due to being unemployed.”
Objective: “To become Overlord of the Galaxy!”
Objective: “What I’m looking for in a job: #1) Money #2) Money #3) Money.”
Hobbies: “Mushroom hunting.”
Experience: “Child care provider: Organized activities; prepared lunches and snakes.”
Objective: “My dream job would be as a professional baseball player, but since I can’t do that, I’ll settle on being an accountant.”
Awards: “National record for eating 45 eggs in two minutes.”
Heading on stationery: “I’d Break Mom’s Heart to Work For You!”
“I am a ‘neat nut’ with a reputation for being hardnosed. I have no patience for sloppywork, carelessmistakes and theft of companytime.”
Experience: “Provide Custer Service.”
Experience: “I was brought in as a turnaround consultant to help turn the company around.”
Strengths: “Ability to meet deadlines while maintaining composer.”
Work experience: “Responsibilities included checking customers out.”
Work experience: “Maintained files and reports, did data processing, cashed employees’ paychecks.”
Educational background: “Highschool was a incredible experience.”
Resume: “A great management team that has patents with its workers.”
Cover letter: “Experienced in all faucets of accounting.”
Objective: “I am anxious to use my exiting skills.”
Personal: “I am loyal and know when to keep my big mouth shut.”
Job duties: “Filing, billing, printing and coping.”
Application: “Q: In what local areas do you prefer to work? A: Smoking.”
Reason for leaving: “Terminated after saying, ‘It would be a blessing to be fired.’”
Personal: “My family is willing to relocate. However not to New England (too cold) and not to Southern California (earthquakes). Indianapolis or Chicago would be fine. My youngest prefers Orlando’s proximity to Disney World.”
Resume: “I have a lifetime’s worth of technical expertise (I wasn’t born - my mother simply chose ‘eject child’ from the special menu.”
Resume: “Spent several years in the United States Navel Reserve.”
Qualifications: “I have extensive experience with foreign accents.”
“I am fully aware of the king of attention this position requires.”
References: “Please do not contact my immediate supervisor at the company. My colleagues will give me a better reference.”
“Worked in a consulting office where I carried out my own accountant.”
Accomplishments: “My contributions on product launches were based on dreams that I had.”
Career: “I have worked with restraints for the past two years.”
Experience: “My father is a computer programmer, so I have 15 years of computer experience.”
Education: “I have a bachelorette degree in computers.”

JobMob Top 10

Application: How large was the department you worked in with your last company? “A: 3 stories.” (Resumania)
A resume listed a skill as “being bi-lingual in three languages” (Ask Annie’s)
Background: “28 dog years of experience in sales (four human).” (Resumania)
In the section that read “Emergency Contact Number” she wrote “911.” (Ask Annie’s)
Candidate drew a picture of a car on the outside of the envelope and said it was the hiring manager’s gift. (Careerbuilder.com)
Languages: “Fluent in English. Also I have been heard muttering Gibberish in my sleep.” (Resumania)
“Directed $25 million anal shipping and receiving operations.” (ResumePower.com)
On one of our applications, a girl wrote ” I’m 16, I’m pregnant and I can do anything.” At the same time she turned in her application, her boyfriend handed in his. On his: “Felony for breaking and entering.” (Ask Annie’s)
“One candidate included clipart on their resume of two cartoons shaking hands.” (Ask Annie’s)
Application: “On the line that asked what “sex” he was, he wrote “occassionally”.” (Ask Annie’s)

This article is part of Litemind’s Lists Group Writing Project.

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